Boca have forgotten the Ã¢ÂÂfundamental principlesÃ¢ÂÂ that took the club to the heights it reached while under the presidency of Mauricio Macri, according to, ahem, Mauricio Macri.
Despite a 4-0 win under their third coach of the season on Monday, things are far from ship shape at the Bombonera.
Martin Palermo finally scored his 219th goal to become the all-time top scorer at the club, but the man who served the goal on a plate Ã¢ÂÂ Juan RomÃÂ¡n Riquelme Ã¢ÂÂ decided to celebrate the goal as if he himself had scored it. He wouldnÃ¢ÂÂt be caught dead congratulating his teammate, no matter how historic the achievement.
The battle of the egos is one problem at Boca, but there are plenty others. It goes back to the Ã¢ÂÂfundamental principles,Ã¢ÂÂ apparently.
Macri - what you get if you cross fun and mental...maybe
Speaking of which, when the Buenos Aires mayor and probable presidential candidate next year is not casting a wistful eye over his former charges, Macri is trying to save the streets of Buenos Aires.
He recently targeted the trapitos - those pesky hawkers who charge you to Ã¢ÂÂtake careÃ¢ÂÂ of your car when you park on the street. When you go to a football game, for example.
Argie Bargy readers will surely find no irony in the fact that the trapitos working during matchdays at Boca are run by the barra brava, La Doce, who in turn receive favours from the board of directorsÃ¢ÂÂ¦
Questioned about his policy of wanting to imprison the trapitos, one interviewer suggested to Macri that a deeper solution to the problem needed to be found, and that imprisoning them all just wasnÃ¢ÂÂt practical.
Ã¢ÂÂDo you just want me to kill them all, then?Ã¢ÂÂ asked a surprised Macri. Ã¢ÂÂI donÃ¢ÂÂt understand.Ã¢ÂÂ
So was that fundamental, or fundamentalist, principles?
Whatever it is, Boca are still in ruins. Some papers claim the club is looking for Plan B, but we all know they are onto Plan D. Alfio Basile was A, Abel Alves B, Tito Pompei is now C and they need to find someone for next season. Favourite for the job, Guillermo Barros Schelotto, isnÃ¢ÂÂt keen (or infact has just said no) while Riquelme is at the club.
In comparison to whoever takes over at the Bombonera, second-choice Steve McClaren must look back at that approach from the FA and feel like a heart throb.
Still, Boca arenÃ¢ÂÂt the only ones changing coach. River PlateÃ¢ÂÂs Leo Astrada became the 7th casualty of the board room guillotine this weekend after a dire goalless draw in TucumÃÂ¡n.
First of all Racing fired Claudio Vivas, AtlÃÂ©tico TucumÃÂ¡n then showed Chiche Sosa the door, Ariel Cuffaro Russo left Central, Fernando Gamboa refused to listen to the board so he quit, Diego Simeone probably slammed the door as he left San Lorenzo, Abel Alves left Boca before suffering a coronary, and now Leo Astrada has joined the list.
Looking like he walked off the set of Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, in between puffs Astrada stressed to journalists that he didnÃ¢ÂÂt quit. He was sacked.
Everybody knows that RiverÃ¢ÂÂs problems run deep, but Astrada can hardly complain after trying 13 different formations in as many games (more formations than goals, pointed out OlÃÂ©), the side hadnÃ¢ÂÂt scored for over 460 minutes and they have one point to show from the last five games.
So who now then? Over 50% of fans wanted RamÃÂ³n DÃÂaz back at the Monumental, some millonario fans even put up a huge banner at the club asking for the return of the Baldy.
President Daniel Passarella had other ideas, however. The man to take over will be ÃÂngel Cappa, the king of the tiki tiki.
While River Plate dream of beautiful football, trophies, eloquent press conferences and progressive politics, other coaches will be worrying about their jobs, or at least suspension.
Omar Asad was watching his side cruise to a 6-2 over Tigre in the Monday Mendoza sun, going top of the table in the process, before Ricardo Caruso kicked a ball his way.
Ã¢ÂÂYouÃ¢ÂÂre full of it,Ã¢ÂÂ shouted the Godoy Cruz coach at his opposite number. Ã¢ÂÂYou take money from your players,Ã¢ÂÂ slapping imaginary 100 peso notes into his hand.
Ã¢ÂÂFatty. Queer. Druggy,Ã¢ÂÂ was CarusoÃ¢ÂÂs instant reply, which just in case nobody had heard or seen, he repeated for the cameras over and over while mysteriously raising an imaginary something to his nose and inhaling.
Ricardo Caruso - Argentinean football's Oscar Wilde
Caruso later denied saying drogÃÂ³n, (druggy), and claimed it was in fact morfÃÂ³n (greedy guts). He, like much of the local press, forgot that he also said falopero several times. Junkie.
In all probability nothing will happen to either coach, but in case AFA are lost for ideas of possible punishments, they could always consult Macri.
ResultsNewellÃ¢ÂÂs 3-0 ChacaritaHuracÃÂ¡n 3-1GimnasiaIndependiente 0-1 San LorenzoLanÃÂºs 0-0 CentralVÃÂ©lez 0-0 BanfieldAtlÃÂ©tico TucumÃÂ¡n 0-0 RiverGodoy Cruz 6-2 TigreEstudiantes 4-0 RacingBoca 4-0 ArsenalArgentinos 3-1 ColÃÂ³n