's hyper-super-mega-quiz

If European football’s elite are good for anything, it’s ensuring those at the pinnacle of the game get adequate recognition for their achievements.

Bearing that in mind, it’s time to warmly welcome another inductee onto the ‘Goldenfoot Award Walk of Fame’.

Yes, that’s right, the award’s annual winner leaves a permanent mould of his footprints on "THE CHAMPIONS PROMENADE " on the seafront of the Principality of Monaco (the Hollywood of football now, apparently…)

The award, now in its sixth year, is only for football players who are at least 29 years old, who stand out for their ‘sport results’, fair play, personality and are revered by both the public and football ‘experts’ (that’ll be you and us, although which way round is up for debate).

This year’s nominees included David Beckham, Thierry Henry and Gianluigi Buffon.

We could just blurt out the winner’s name in gay abandon, but instead we thought we’d tease you with this rather perplexing, if pointless, quiz:

  • I was born on April 10th 1973 on a coffee farm.
  • I have played a total of 13,320 minutes of international football to date, featuring in three World Cups, four continental Championships, one Confederations Cup and one Olympic football championships.
  • While I was at my first club I supported myself financially by working in a fabric factory
  • In 2004 Pele named me one of his 125 ‘greatest living footballers’, putting me on a par with Hong Myung-Bo and El Hadji Diouf.
  • My idol is God, I’ve read his book and everything…
  • I share my name with a Grammy Award-winning singer known as ‘the King’ in my homeland

Given up? No, it’s not Elvis Hammond (we knew that ‘King’ bit would throw you off the scent), it is none other than Fenerbahce’s former Real Madrid and Brazil swervy-rockety free-kick maestro Roberto Carlos. 

"Next stop, eBay!"

And who are we to argue when he’s capable of this…