Real Madrid complete signing of the century

After months of media speculation, rampant rumour mongering and downright dodgy deception, the transfer deal of this and perhaps all summers has finally been sealed.

And the news was met by incredible scenes of joy and jubilation on the streets of a stunned Spain, causing some head-shaking historians to compare them with the people of Paris welcoming the Allied tanks during their liberation from Hitler's hordes.

On Thursday, former Real Madrid youth team full back Filipe Luis made his two year loan deal with Deportivo permanent causing tearful scenes throughout Galicia.


Filipe Luis: The name on every Real Madrid fan's lips 

"I just can't believe it," sobbed one Deportivo fan. "Now, anything is possible, next season. Maybe even 15th."

"It's just too much to take in, at once," mumbled the owner of one local bar. "I've been following them for 40 years, just for this moment."  

After 78 hours of talks, exhausted club presidents Ramón Calderón and Augusto Lendoiro walked from the hotel conference room to confirm the details of the record-breaking four year deal and the stunning 2.2 million euro fee - funds which are set to be reinvested by the Bernabeu outfit on Cristiano Ronaldo's belly button fluff.

Over in the Kingdom of Catalunya, things could not be more different with underwhelmed Barcelona fans shrugging their indifference at the recent signings of Gerard Piqué, Seydou Keita and José Martin Cáceres - with a 'principle of agreement' having been signed between Barça and Villarreal for the defender.

On the websites of both Sport and Mundo Deportivo, 51% and 54% of those taking part in an online poll have said none of the three signings announced by the Catalan club have got their footballing juices flowing.

But that has not stopped their latest defensive import from spouting off about his new footballing challenge.

"I'm excited because it's the best team in Spain," squealed the Uruguayan centre back, overlooking the fact that he was reportedly turned down by the best team in Spain and has decided to leave the second best.


Pique's return does little to stir beleagured Barca fans 

Those boisterous Betis fans who have written into La Liga Loca in the past to rage against the sorry stewardship of the Andalusian outfit should be hanging their heads in shame today.

That's because their glorious leader, Darth Manuel Ruis de Lopera has come out to say that he only ever had the best interests of the club at heart.

Whilst tickling the tail of his beloved Hugo - his Husky - the Betis majority shareholder maintained that he has no plans to sell up and get out of town, despite what pitchfork waving, media-manipulated opposition groups are calling for.

"If Betis is being managed so badly and Manuel Ruiz de Lopera is not capable of doing it, Beticos should make offers. The opposition has never made an offer," declared the dog lover on the supporters' inability to raise the multi-trillion euro asking price for the club.

De Lopera also warned that Paco Chaparro would not have a plump transfer war chest at his disposal this summer, due to an "economic war" at the club and his heartfelt desire not to "ruin the club."

That and the inconvenience of having to face charges of his part Russian-owned holding company skimming a percentage of the club's income.

Money is also on the minds of the Levante players who are still waiting for their bank accounts to be filled with the funds owed to them by the relegated club.

Some seven days ago, the bigwigs of the Valencia based club announced that "for administrative reasons the arrival of the money will have to be delayed for a week."

But it seems that the funds are still to appear, despite this promise, with Marca reporting that the missing money is being sent by an Italian finance company via a Swiss bank before being forwarded to Spain.

Finally, the Spanish professional league (LFP) has found itself in possession of a cemetery - no, not Espanyol - but a corner of coffin-covered land in Spain's hot-spot of dodgy doings, Marbella.

Marca write that a judge has awarded the LFP this peculiar prize to pay off debts owed from the days when now deceased mafia madman, Jesus Gíl, was in charge of Atlético Madrid.

Another grave situation for the Spanish game.

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