Video Stars: Noteworthy goals & nincompoopery
Goals? Check. Brilliant goals? Check. Own goals? Check. Other assorted foul-ups? Check. It can only be Video Stars.
WeÃ¢ÂÂve rounded up the top six super strikes of the week below.
But before we get into those corkers, have a look at these nearly-men who, like the extra scenes on a DVD, didnÃ¢ÂÂt quite make the final cut.
Edison MÃÂ©ndez kicks us off, much as he did on Sunday when he opened the scoring for PSV with this long range scorcher in their 6-2 thumping of Ajax Ã¢ÂÂ who themselves won 7-0 last week.
There was another high-scoring match in Brazil on Sunday - Caxias were 7-0 down to Internacional by half time, and 8-1 down by the final whistle. MagrÃÂ£o scored the pick of the bunch with this lovely chip from the edge of the box for number six.
And for number seven, Taison produced this great surging run into the area before squaring the ball for AndrÃÂ©s D'Alessandro to score.
Back in Europe, and the pick of the goals from Italy was Filippo Inzaghi's second for Milan against Torino, courtesy of David Beckham's pin-point chip into the area.
While over in Spain, ApoÃÂ±o scored a sweet first-time volley for Malaga in their 1-1 draw with Mallorca.
And Ever Banega opened the scoring for Atletico in a 3-0 win against Numancia, collecting the ball on the edge of the area, surging towards goal, selling the defender the dummy, and then slamming the ball past the keeper and into the roof of the net.
GOALS OF THE WEEK
But now to the main feature presentation. Here, in alphabetical order, are the top six goals of the week.
1. Anfield has seen some special matches, and another one was added to the roll call of greats on Tuesday when Liverpool and Arsenal shared the spoils on a breathless four-all draw.
The best goal of the night was the second for four-goal hero Andrei Arshavin which leveled the tie at 2-2.
Arshavin tonks home: VIDEO HERE
2. Achille Emana scored both goals on Sunday as Real Betis beat Sporting Gijon 2-0.
His first was a cracker, meeting Ricardo Oliveira's lay-off with a beautifully struck volley from the edge of the area that literally flew past Sporting keeper Ivan Pichu into the top corner.
Emana rocket: VIDEO HERE
3. Staying in Spain, Gonzalo Higuain's injury-time winner for 10-man Real Madrid in their 3-2 win over Getafe on Tuesday had the whole of the Bernabeu off their seats. Magic stuff.
Gonzo to the rescue: VIDEO HERE
4. Steve McClaren has defied his many, many, many critics by guiding FC Twente to the final of the Dutch Cup, although there is of course still scope for him to cock it up.
Theo Jansse helped the former England boss get there by volleying home a pin-point cross as they came from behind to beat NAC Breda in the semi-final.
Theo keeps his eyes on it: VIDEO HERE
5. Jason Kennedy larrups home a dipping, swerving 25-yarder for Darlington at Rochdale Ã¢ÂÂ sweet revenge after his penalty shootout miss on the same ground in last seasonÃ¢ÂÂs play-off semi final cost his team a trip to Wembley.
Kennedy exacts revenge: VIDEO HERE
6. Borussia DortmundÃ¢ÂÂs second goal in a 2-0 away win at Bochum was a corker: Nelson Valdez curls his shot around the flailing keeper from outside the area.
Valdez picks his spot: VIDEO HERE
After being on relatively good behaviour for some weeks now, normal service has resumed among footballers everywhere, as nincompoopery was being displayed on pitches all over the world.
OGGY OGGY OGGY
WeÃ¢ÂÂll start with the own goal parade.
FlamengoÃ¢ÂÂs Emerson gets us underway with this effort for opposition Botafogo.
BolognaÃ¢ÂÂs Manuel Belleri hands Palermo an early lead, stretching out a leg out to divert Giovanni TedescoÃ¢ÂÂs cross over his own keeper and in.
Preston go 4-0 up at home to Cardiff, with Mark Kennedy burying Neil MellorÃ¢ÂÂs cross past his own keeper via the inside of a post.
And Leeds defender Sam Sodje over-cooks his back-header to keeper Casper Ankergren to hand Tranmere a lifeline at Elland Road.
MINISTRY OF DEFENCE
This lot think it far more sporting to let the opposition actually score, but theyÃ¢ÂÂre not averse to helping in any way they can.
First to Cologne vs Stuttgart and a goal from StuttgartÃ¢ÂÂs Mario Gomez that our Bundesliga correspondent Ulrich Hesse-Lichtenberger simply described as Ã¢ÂÂa goal you shouldn't concede.Ã¢ÂÂ
In a 6-2 match there were bound to be some foul-ups. Step forward AjaxÃ¢ÂÂs Jan Vertonghen who laid on a horrendous back-pass for Nordin Amrabat to score PSVÃ¢ÂÂs third.
While in Brazil, Santos goalkeeper Fabio Costa gift-wraps a goal for Palmeiras.
MEET THE MISSES
ItÃ¢ÂÂs a shame Manchester City didnÃ¢ÂÂt get their hands on Ricky Kaka in January. With finishing like this he would fit right in at Eastlands. Here he is blasting the ball over the bar from six-yards.
And finally to Spain, where GetafeÃ¢ÂÂs Javier Casquero attempted to chip a penalty over Iker Casillas at the Bernabeu. Casillas caught it and Casquero looked like a right old wally.