Swoosh! Pow! Blam! Zok!
No, we havenÃ¢ÂÂt resurrected the camp 1960s version of Batman. Instead, that is the sound of the best goals from all over the world flying into nets past despairing goalkeepersÃ¢ÂÂ outstretched fingers. Welcome to Video Stars.
WeÃ¢ÂÂve rounded up the top six goals of the week below.
But before we get into those crackers, have a look at these strikes which, just like Carlos Tevez, are consigned to forever remain on the bench.
WeÃ¢ÂÂll start with one of the more bizarre goals weÃ¢ÂÂve seen in a while. Have you ever seen a tackle/goal? You have now, thanks to Karlsruhe defender Sebastian Langkamp who scored the winner against Bayer Leverkusen last weekend.
Manchester City reject Rolando Ã¢ÂÂthe RatÃ¢ÂÂ Bianchi also scored the winner for his side. This sweet backheel sealed a 1-0 win for Torino against Siena.
ItÃ¢ÂÂs not often that Barcelona get out-BarcaÃ¢ÂÂd. But Valencia managed it with this cute effort from Pablo Hernandez putting the home side 2-1 up.
Over in Brazil, it's a case of 'same old Ronaldo, always scoring'. He bagged a couple more last time out, the first a neat move, catching his Santos marker out of position and punishing him to the max.
While in the less glamorous surrounds of Birmingham, PrestonÃ¢ÂÂs Paul McKenna levels the scores with a long-range rocket...
GOALS OF THE WEEK
But now to the top of the pops. Here, in alphabetical order, is this weekÃ¢ÂÂs top six.
1. How often do you see these speculative efforts go flying into row z to howls of derision from the opposition fans? Not this time, Marcelo Goianira rifles in this rocket for Estrela da Amadora at Sporting Lisbon.
Goianira goes long: VIDEO HERE
2. Next to Italy, and a goal that is the very definition of a 30-yard bullet into the top corner. Emil Hallfredsson does the business for Reggina against Juventus.
Hallfredsson lets fly: VIDEO HERE
3. Ronaldo's up to his old tricks again, bagging this tasty-as-chocolate chip for Corinthians against Santos.
Ronnie loves chips: VIDEO HERE
4. Staying in Brazil, Gremio beat Boyaca Chico in the Copa Libertadores, with Souza opening the scoring in the 12th minute with this 20-yard curler using the outside of his boot. Pick that out.
Souza swerver: VIDEO HERE
5. Having already seen Preston team-mate Paul McKenna rifle home from distance (see above), Ross Wallace decides enough is enough and spanks home this beauty of a free-kick in the last minute to ruin Birmingham's promotion party.
Wallace stuns St Andrews: VIDEO HERE
6. And they really have been flying in over in South America this week. Finally, an 87th minute blast from Cleiton Xavier sends Palmeiras through to the next stage of the Copa Libertadores, knocking opponents Colo-Colo out in the process. Ouch.
Xavier blockbuster: VIDEO HERE
Before you go off thinking all footballers are filthy rich, married to beautiful women and supremely talented, have a look at David Beckham looking like a right wally, falling over as he takes this free-kick.
In Spain, Getafe's Serbian keeper Vladimir StojkoviÃÂ had a mare, spilling a shot to allow Joan Capdevila in to score for Villarreal.
And lastly, Birmingham City fans would have been celebrating promotion this week had Cameron Jerome not fluffed his lines. The former Cardiff front-man chests the ball down six-yards out but blazes over with the goal at his mercy.
Until next time...