"Make mine a half, Jeff..."

Before you place your order at the bar this summer, consult our pub calorie counter, which outlines exactly how to burn off all that sausage and mash

 

Pint of lager: 256 calories

More after the break

A pint equals a 30-minute run. You’ll get stick from your mates for it, but you might as well start practicing your summer stock phrase: ‘Make mine a half’.
 
Burn off with one of the below:
Running: 30 mins
Cycling: 25 mins
Five-a-side: 20 mins 
 

Pint of Guinness: 210 calories

Good news: One pint of the black stuff per day reduces your risk of heart attacks caused by blood clots. Bad news: that intake will increase the likelihood of moobs.
 
Burn off with one of the below:    
Swimming: 27 mins
Rowing: 25 mins
Five-a-side: 17 mins 
 

Glass of white wine: 84 calories

Ordering a glass of vino won’t earn you points in the dressing room, but you won’t be clocking too many points on the calorie counter either. Bonus.
 
Burn off with one of the below:
Running: 10 mins
Cycling: 9 mins
Five-a-side: 7 mins
 
Glass of rosé: 83 calories
 
Research shows that being physically active and drinking a moderate amount of alcohol is important for lowering the risk of fatal heart disease, so there are benefits.
 
Burn off with one of the below:    
Swimming: 11 mins
Rowing: 10 mins
Five-a-side: 7 mins 
 

Club sandwich: 750 calories

A club you want to avoid frequenting too often over the summer. The benefits of the chicken’s protein are countered by the salt from the bacon. Hold the hog when you order.
 
Burn off with one of the below:      
Running: 1 hour 29 mins
Cycling: 1 hour 18 mins
Five-a-side: 62 mins

Scampi & chips: 1369 calories

No pub menu is complete without it, but this traditional fishy fare provides minimal nutritional benefits. A mammoth rowing session will restore parity.
 
Burn off with one of the below:    
Cycling: 2 hours 22 mins
Rowing: 2 hours 42 mins
Five-a-side: 1 hour 54 mins 
 

Full English breakfast: 906 calories

The ultimate hangover cure? It’s a myth and don’t defend it by pointing to the tomatoes and mushrooms. On average it contains 26g of fat. Prepare to put in a shift if you order this.
 
Burn off with one of the below:      
Running: 1 hour 48 mins
Swimming: 1 hour 58 mins
Five-a-side: 1 hour 15 mins
 

Hamburger and chips: 881 calories

The optimist will see a harmless serving of protein and carbohydrates; the realist sees a buffet of fat.
 
Burn off with one of the below:    
Cycling: 1 hour 31 mins
Swimming: 1 hour 55 mins
Five-a-side: 1 hour 13 mins
 

Roast dinner - the works: 1529 calories

Pay the price for every Brit’s favourite indulgence - we're talking chicken, roast potatoes, Yorkshire puddings and vegetables - by playing into extra-time on the five-a-side pitch.
 
Burn off with one of the below:
Running: 3 hours
Swimming: 3 hours 2 mins
Five-a-side: 2 hours 6 mins
 

Sausage & mash: 887 calories

The classic hat-trick of sausage, mash and gravy should now be accompanied by the trio of running shoes, swimming trunks and football boots.
 
Burn off with one of the below:      
Running: 1 hour 45 mins
Swimming: 1 hour 56 mins
Five-a-side: 1 hour 14 mins
 

Ploughmans: 461 calories

Don’t be fooled by the salad: you’re going to have to hit the pool for an hour to work off the cheese and butter in this British classic.
 
Burn off with one of the below:    
Cycling: 48 mins
Swimming: 1 hour
Five-a-side: 38 mins
 

Cheese and tuna panini: 551 calories

The Ole Gunnar Solskjaer of pub grub. Not first choice on the menu, but the protein and omega 3 rich tuna will make an impact off the bench.
 
Burn off with one of the below:    
Cycling: 57 mins
Swimming: 1 hour 12 mins
Five-a-side: 46 mins
 

Chicken fajita wrap: 374 calories

If you’re going to eat at the pub this should be your number one pick. Powered by protein, this will help build and repair your muscles.
 
Burn off with one of the below:
Cycling: 39 mins
Swimming: 9 mins
Five-a-side: 31 mins
 

Bowl of chips: 363 calories

It’s a good source of carbohydrates – your body’s main source of energy - but if you’re not burning them off they will soon turn into stomach-swelling fat.
 
Burn off with one of the below:
Cycling: 38 mins
Rowing: 43 mins
Five-a-side: 30 mins
 

Pork scratchings: 121 calories

Sales rose by 50 per cent during the 2010 World Cup. Your waistline will increase by the same amount if you partner a pint with a packet of these boar snacks.
 
Burn off with one of the below: 
Running: 14 mins
Swimming: 16 mins
Five-a-side: 10 mins
 

Bag of crisps (32.5g): 171 calories

Eating a packet of crisps a day for a year can be the equivalent of drinking almost five litres of cooking oil. That’s some serious grease.
 
Burn off with one of the below:    
Cycling: 18 mins
Swimming: 22 mins
Five-a-side: 14 mins
 

Nachos plate for one: 1139 calories

Nachos drenched in cheese, sour cream and guacamole? Get in. Almost two hours out on the bike to burn it all off? Get out.
 
Burn off with one of the below:    
Cycling: 1 hour 58 mins
Rowing: 2 hours 15 mins
Five-a-side: 1 hour 34 mins
 

Dry roasted peanuts (25g): 147 calories

Full of protein, but keep your portion sizes in check. Roasted nuts get blasted in unhealthy fats and high temperatures can destroy their nutrients.
 
Burn off with one of the below:      
Running: 18 mins
Cycling: 16 mins
Five-a-side: 12 mins
 

Salted peanuts (25g): 150 calories

The king of bar snacks is full of brain-boosting healthy fats and vitamin E, but don’t get too carried away because they’re high in calories and sodium.
 
Burn off with one of the below:    
Swimming: 20 mins
Rowing: 18 mins
Five-a-side: 12 mins
 
Also see:
Win or lose, beat the booze
Food myths busted
Eating out before the big game

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