Football will clean up David Ginola, Ginola promises
David Ginola today promised football fans that his FIFA presidential campaign would be a massive turning point for David Ginola’s future.
The former Tottenham star has revealed that he was moved to run against Sepp Blatter in the forthcoming FIFA presidential election by the chance to restore dignity and financial stability to one veteran French footballer.
“I promise that football will clean up David Ginola,” Ginola told FourFourTwo.
“Some people may doubt my campaign, but I can honestly say that it will make a massive difference to me, my bank balance and ultimately, my future as an ageing fanny-rat.
“Once upon a time Ginola used to wear snappy suits and flaunt his lustrous hair to sell shampoo, these days he’s lucky if he gets on [A] Question of Sport.
“This vast pay-cheque for making a futile, counter-productive effort to become FIFA president will give a new lease of life to Ginola: before long [Sue] Barker will be making [lacklustre] innuendo with Ginola once more.”
Ginola’s chances of becoming FIFA president are believed to be remote as no member nation will back his bid, although several have expressed an interest in buying some shampoo from him.
The former Lothario/winger has already been criticised for his press conferences during which he was unable to name a single FIFA exco member, the president he is challenging, or the name of the sport he used to play.
Silver fox Ginola has until January 29 to muster five nominations, otherwise he faces the indignity of earning £250,000 for a fortnight of vainglorious, hyperbolic bull-flop.