The knees are creaking, the shovel foot is digging up more potholes than scoring goals and your first touch is generally a 10-yard pass.
More after the break
Don't give up, there's hope yet. FourFourTwo Performance recruited Manchester United's first team coach Rene Meulensteen to give you advice on learning a new skill.
Absorb the Dutchman's wisdom and you'll soon be mastering control with the swagger of a Red Devil.