England boss Roy Hodgson has warned his team to expect a national football team under the auspices of the Lithuanian Football Federation when they take on Lithuania at Wembley.
The Three Lions will be expected to maintain their 100 percent record in Euro 2016 qualifying Group E when they take on Lithuania, but a methodical Hodgson ordered a thorough scouting report ahead of the clash.
However, when the report arrived yesterday it bore a striking resemblance to the Wikipedia page for the Lithuania national football team, leaving the England boss struggling to give an insight into the opposition.
“In Lithuania we have a team who played its first match in 1923,” Hodgson told FourFourTwo.
“In 1940, Lithuania was occupied by the Soviet Union; the country regained its independence in 1990 and played their first match as a new nation against Georgia on 27 May of that year. The 15,030 capacity Zalgiris Stadium became home of the national football team.”
When asked who might pose a threat to England’s backline, Hodgson initially suggested Lithuania’s all-time top scorer Tomas Danilevicius, who retired in 2012, or Antanas Lingis, who passed away in 1941, before pointing out that Lithuania’s biggest defeat was 10-0 to Egypt on May 27, 1924.
“They have some good young talent coming through,” Hodgson warned, scanning a squad list. “Like Justinas Janusevskij and Tautvydas Eliosius.”
When asked for more information on the men he had named, Hodgson was forced to admit that they were red links but invited the public to start an account and create an article using the Article Wizard, if possible before kick-off this evening.
“Lithuania is bordered by Latvia to the north, Belarus to the east and south, Poland to the south and the Kaliningrad Oblast (a Russian enclave) to the south-west,” Hodgson concluded. “Lithuania experienced a drought in 2002, causing forest and peat bog fires.”
England’s scouting is usually renowned for its thorough analysis. In Estonia, England were able to dominate possession due to a keen awareness of their opponents’ formation, while against San Marino Hodgson’s men weren’t fazed by the minnows possessing the oldest written constitution still in effect.
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