Good Day, Bad Day Ã¢ÂÂ Round 29
Angel Javier Arizmendi
"The worst player scores the best goal," declared an astonished Spanish hack moments after the Valencia striker/full-back/ waste of space poked the ball past a baffled and bewildered Iker Casillas. He wasn't alone in his thoughts.
Before the late, late show, Arizmendi was happily showing why he remains one of the worst players in Spanish football history with an outstanding display of mishit crosses and aimless wanderings. Until he popped up with his first goal since February 2007.
"I saw Villa was being marked, so the best option was to shoot at goal," he claimed, although La Liga Loca suspects it was a sliced cross that produced the goal. "I will always have the memory of it," beamed the king of spawn who only has another 13 months to wait until his next.
The Valencia stopper played a blinder on Sunday night, with the best save of his match-winning performance being a block from a bullet header by Raul. The German keeper had been a bit of a flapping failure for much of the season but has come into form just in time to help give a tiny bit of respectability back to Valencia.
"It has been a fantastic three days," grinned his manager Ronald Koeman, who beat BarÃÂ§a on Thursday, had his birthday on Friday and mugged Real Madrid on Sunday.
"I don't know what I'll do on Monday," mused the Dutch coach after the game but the blog suspects it may involve a case of Cacique, David Albeda's house and a loudhailer.
Top Spanish goalscorer along with Dani GÃÂ¼iza, but still won't deserve a place in the national team until he stops doing that unbelievably annoying name-pointing goal celebration. Although blowing kisses to Figo in the stands Ã¢ÂÂ or Figo's supermodel Swedish misses, perhaps Ã¢ÂÂ was a new one.
'The night of Bojan' wrote El Pais as it reflected on Sunday's 4-1 win over a typically cavalier Valladolid Ã¢ÂÂ a team who deserve to stay up because of their positive approach to the beautiful game.
The two goals from Bojan helped silence the boos of the typically testy Camp Nou crowd and close the gap on Real Madrid to four. But it is too early to say that all is well in the Kingdom of Catalunya Ã¢ÂÂ instead, next weekend's battle in Betis will be a proper test to see if Barcelona really mean it, man.
My my, AtlÃÂ©tico Madrid have suddenly grown a pair. After La Liga Loca predicted that the rojiblanco's would return from Andalusia with nothing but a spanking to show for their efforts, they came back with three points after surviving being booted around for 90 minutes by an unbelievably filthy Sevilla side, with Poulsen, Alves and Fabiano all guilty of some horrendous tackles.
AtlÃÂ©tico have now won three from four in the league and this is thanks in part to the form of Simao who is finally showing why he may be worth the oodles of cash paid to Benfica, over the summer.
If La Liga Loca was an average to decent professional footballer it would almost certainly be begging to play for Mallorca. A pleasant place to live, decent weather and supporters Ã¢ÂÂ like the blog's readers Ã¢ÂÂ with few expectations of excellence.
Mallorca's record over the past six years is 16th, 9th, 11th, 17th, 13th, 12th and a Copa del Rey win. And this is just fine for both the club and fans.
The blog thought that Mallorca had the squad to push for Europe this season, but it looks like being another mid-table finish with the club needing just two or three more wins before it's holiday time.
And with Arango becoming the second highest scorer in the club's history with his lucky strike against Deportivo, alongside GÃÂ¼iza, they should have no problem getting them.
Either Javier Clemente's magical managerial powers are beginning to work or Espanyol are blooming awful. Murcia fans won't care either way.
A four-goal pounding of the Perico's after six successive defeats will lift the spirits of the side a little, but their six points from safety suggests it may be too late.
After nearly an hour after the referee had blown the final whistle, there was still no sign of big Bernd Schuster and a rumour was running around the press room that the incredible sulk had thrown in the Real Madrid towel. Admittedly, it was started by La Liga Loca.
But eventually the German came out looking so crestfallen that the hungry hacks didn't have the heart to lay into him.
To be fair to Real Madrid, they played better than they have done for some time Ã¢ÂÂ although that's not saying much Ã¢ÂÂ but thanks to Gonzalo Higuain's continued inability to finish they suffered their second home defeat in three and their ninth loss of 2008.
Marca is right when it says that "bad luck cannot hide a crisis at Real Madrid". Although AS's Tomas Roncero shows that he may well have been on the turps again with his declaration that "it's nine defeats in 17 games, something that's not happened in the history of the GCW (the greatest club in the world)".
But one club's crisis has revived a title race that was dead buried and that can only be a good thing.
Oh dear. The plight of the Perico's has left Paul from Barcelona speechless. Nearly.
"Awful. Just awful. This year's 'Nastic result. We were lucky to get 0. Your favourite player scores the winner against Madrid. BarÃÂ§a get dodgy penalty awarded against them. At home! Strange weekend."
It looks like it could be a five-match ban for Sevilla's Italian midfielder. On the pitch for just six minutes and Maresca objected to something Kun AgÃÂ¼ero said to him and he nearly smashed the Argentinian's nose into his brain Bruce Willis/Last Boy Scout style.
The very excellent Dani Alves on the very awful Club de Futbol agreed that Maresca's moment of madness was inexcusable although Sevilla coach, Manolo JimÃÂ©nez claimed that, "although he is only 20, AgÃÂ¼ero knows everything. He fouled him and then went face to face with Maresca".
"He almost killed me," said AgÃÂ¼ero Ã¢ÂÂ who is actually as tough as old boots Ã¢ÂÂ and went onto to claim that he simply told Maresca to clear the ball with Perea needing treatment.
The Betis boss showed why a lack of class or dignity runs throughout the club from top to bottom. On Saturday, he more or less accused Athletic of faking the severity of the injury to Armando after stories broke that the keeper was in contention for Sunday's squad. "He's recovered faster knowing the punishment".
But Chaparro wasn't finished. Instead of counting his blessings after a 1-0 win over Osasuna in a game El Pais said his side, "had two shots but got three points", the dyed-hair disaster declared that: "The 25 minutes against Athletic will be played. They have to be played."
Not even a fine goalkeeping attempt from what appeared to be Sergio Garcia could prevent AlmerÃÂa's late equaliser from making it another month of misery for Real Zaragoza, a side just one point from the relegation zone.
Two more defeats and it's adios to Levante.
Two worrying injuries from the weekend, with Valencia's Carlos Marchena taking one for the team by blocking a free-kick with his skull and needing a night in hospital to recover.
And Athletic Bilbao's Joseba Garmendia having to be forced from the field by his team-mates, after the midfielder clashed with Pato and attempted to play on, despite having no idea of where he was.