Cunning old goat that he is, Pep Guardiola has lowered expectations to such an extent that a Jens Lehmann hat-trick in a 3-0 defeat against Stuttgart on Tuesday would be a fine result for his Dream Boys.
The UEFA Champions League returned in style last week with some cracking goals, another swirl of controversy surrounding bald Scandinavian referees and a performance by Wayne Rooney that suggested heÃ¢ÂÂs determined to nick the Ballon dÃ¢ÂÂOr off Lionel Messi.
RESULTS Sat Feb 20 Arsenal 2-0 Sunderland, Everton 3-1 Manchester United, Portsmouth 1-2 Stoke, West Ham 3-0 Hull, Wolvers 0-2 Chelsea Sun Feb 21 Aston Villa 5-2 Burnley, Blackburn 3-0 Bolton, Fulham 2-1 Birmingham, Manchester City 0-0 Liverpool, Wigan 0-3 Tottenham
You know the drill: Portuguese side brings in player from South America. South American player impresses - both in domestically and in European competition. Team in more established league signs said player for big bucks.
RESULTS Sat Feb 20 Genoa 3-0 Udinese, Internazionale 0-0 Sampdoria Sun Feb 21 Atalanta 0-1 Chievo, Bari 0-2 Milan, Bologna 1-2 Juventus, Cagliari 2-0 Parma, Fiorentina 2-1 Livorno, Palermo 3-1 Lazio, Roma 1-0 Catania, Siena 0-0 Napoli