Barça fire rude response to Real Madrid

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Like a date with La Liga Loca, Barcelona’s encounter with Sevilla was only fun for two minutes. But at least the fans didn’t walk off promising to call the next day.

Two minutes was how long it took for Pep’s Dream Boys to post their single-finger response to Real Madrid’s fist-waving fury from the previous night.

Two minutes was how long it took for Barça’s hero of the hour, Andrés Iniesta, to smack a shot past the hapless Javi Varas in the Sevilla goal.

Two minutes was how long it took for everyone in Spain to switch over to watch Desperate Housewives. Or, for those treasonous types, Manchester United’s Premier League clash with Portsmouth.

On Wednesday night, Sevilla showed just how truly average and uninspiring they have become under Manolo Jiménez, the man who took over the club’s reins from Juande Ramos.

Getafe had an excuse or two for barely having a touch in their Coliseum clash on Saturday night: theyh’re not very good and are being managed by Victor Muñoz.

But Sevilla have no such fallback position for the four goals conceded, or the two shots in response that was their wonderful night’s work.

Jiménez admitted that “we were infinitely inferior to them” and bleated that “you have to be perfect to beat them.”

You have to at least try to beat them, huffs La Liga Loca to a manager who waved the white flag from the off by leaving Freddie Kanouté on the bench.

Manolo eschews the option of brown trousers

Sport’s headline notes that “Who laughs last laughs longer,” while the considerably less literate Mundo Deportivo - the paper that communicates in grunts and clicks - yells ‘Superstar!’ at Iniesta.

“Barcelona are unstoppable,” opines Sport’s Josep Maria Casanovas. “La Liga will not be lost, despite certain referees.”

And Josep is probably correct in his assumption, considering there are just six games to go and Madrid have to face Sevilla in the Sánchez Pizjuán without Pepe, Sneijder, Robben and Higuaín (pending an appeal).

Elsewhere on Wednesday night, Osasuna found themselves suffering at the hands of a life-risking referee in Pamplona in their clash against Málaga.

The relegation-battling Basques were punished with the softest of penalties in the opening minutes before losing three more players and their manager in a game where the man in the middle seemed to quite enjoy himself – unlike the furious white-hankie/plastic bag-waving fraternity who watched their team crash to a 2-3 home defeat.

Osasuna fans: "May we have a word?"

Elsewhere, David Villa struck twice to beat Betis 2-1 at home in a match where Unai Emery claimed “the second half was ours” but where opposition coach José Maria Nogúes felt that “the second half was more open.”

And Deportivo beat Almería.

Thursday night sees what uncharitable types would describe as the runt of la Liga’s midweek fixtures. In the 10pm kick-off against Valladolid, Mallorca are hoping to see their crowd reach double figures.

“The other day, Arsenal's Alex Song told me that we are the only league you watch in bed when you go to sleep,” joked Mallorca striker Pierre Webo on the preposterous start time.

Meanwhile, two bald men fight over a comb in Gíjon as Sporting take on Espanyol. Atlético are set for another dazzling away day defeat, this time against Racing Santander, while Villarreal will continue to show indifference to la Liga with a narrow, scrapping win over Recreativo.

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