The Trainspotting Weekend Predictions

Saturday

Real Zaragoza (20th) v Sporting (17th)

When looking for news on a specific team on the Marca and AS websites, the blog constantly has to remember the two different ways the organisations make such information available - quite a feat for the rather slow-witted LLL.

Marca helpfully lists all the clubs in alphabetical order across a banner at the top. AS puts them in a similar format but details them by league position in a fairly annoying fashion.

However, thanks to Zaragoza being quite, quite rubbish this season, both have the Aragonese outfit in the same spot. At the end. Nice.

LLL Prediction - Home win

Real Sociedad (16th) v Espanyol (6th)

La Real’s latest clash sees Raúl Tamudo coming face-to-hamster face with his old teammates, having left Espanyol in the summer after 38 years running frenetically around the club’s big wheel of destiny. 

Despite playing 334 games for the Pericos and scoring 129 goals along the way, the farewell of the rodent-resembling rampager was not the best it could have been after a tumultuous final year in el Prat-land that saw all kinds of tears and tantrums concerning his future at the club.

“I don’t think you can say I’m desperate for revenge,” mused Tamudo, as he twitched his whiskers thoughtfully. “I don’t want the game to be Tamudo against Espanyol.”

And the big question of whether he would celebrate a goal against the Pericos? “Don’t know. I haven’t really thought about it.”

LLL Prediction - Home win

Valencia (1st) v Athletic Bilbao (9th)

Valencia may not have had a particularly good time of it this week in a sporting sense after a 0-1 defeat to Manchester United, which was owed in large part to the general uselessness of Roberto Soldado in front of goal.

However, there was better news in the financial world of Mestalla with the announcement that the club has managed to reduce its debt over the past 12 months to a trifling €400m, although there still isn’t enough cash floating about to restart work on the new stadium which has seen €150m of Valencia’s cash poured in and so far wasted. A sort of concrete version of Real Madrid’s latest transfer dealings, as it were.

The more stable financial footing for the league leaders does mean that “the club doesn’t have to sell any more players,” according Valencia president, Manuel Llorente, much to the disappointed of the still-want-away and very underpaid compared to his teammates, Juan Mata.

LLL Prediction - Draw

Sunday

Sevilla (7th) v Atlético Madrid (5th)

Atlético Madrid are doing the right thing by getting themselves knocked out of the Europa League as fast as humanely possible, although the Rojiblancos did trip up on Thursday night at the Calderón with Simao preventing what would have been a very handy 1-0 defeat with a second-half equaliser.

It was more serious stuff for Sevilla in their first game under Gregorio Manzano which produced a 1-0 win away at Borussia Dortmund in their “German Hell” as AS put it rather over-dramatically.

LLL Prediction - Home win

Getafe (10th) v Hércules (8th)

If Hércules had not spent so much money on incentives in getting promoted to la Primera - payments to their own players LLL would like to make very, very, very clear - then the Alicante club could have had the forgotten man of Spanish football, Dani Güiza, banging the goals in for them instead of the forgotten man of French football, David Trezeguet.

Already exiled in Turkey with Fenerbahce - apparently the only club willing to cope with his night-life loving ways Güiza - the Geezer’s profile dropped even further over the summer when he failed to make Spain’s World Cup squad.

“I had my bottles (notice the plural - LLL) of champagne ready for when they gave out the list, but they stayed there,” recalled a sorrowful Güiza, currently in Spain recovering from surgery on his Achilles tendon. “They took away my dream I’ve had from when I was a kid of playing in the World Cup with my country.”

Oh dear. All the blog can say is come home soon Dani, la Liga needs you. And so do the recession-hit nightspots of Spain.

LLL Prediction - Draw

Villarreal (2nd) v Racing (15th)

With the most sophisticated of flicks, LLL has just turned the page on its Spanish Railways calendar (which it was given for free, it would like to add) to welcome in October. And the month to come is pictured by RENFE by what appears a goods train pulling some...goods...through somewhere green. 

The new month also sees the blog’s first - and probably last because it will almost certainly have forgotten in 30 days time - player of the month award. And September’s goes to Santi Cazorla for both some lovely midfield play pushing Villarreal into second and his ability to store food in his rodent-like cheeks during games.

With both Xavi and Cesc Fabregas sitting out Spain’s upcoming clashes against Lithuania and Scotland and Diddy David Silva suffering at tad at City it could be a fine spell for Santi in la Seleccíon, too

“I wasn’t myself before,” explained the Villarreal man over last season’s struggles to find form. “I didn’t feel completely well, there was always something holding me back.”

LLL Prediction - Home win

Almería (13th) v Málaga (12th)

This game is all about speed, speed, speed with the home side fielding probably la Liga’s fastest player in Albert Crusat and the wondrous visiting wingers for Málaga of Quincy and Eliseu.

The Almería man has boasted that “when I was a kid, they gave me a diploma for running the 100 metres under 11 seconds,” claiming that he can do the distance in about 10.5 seconds.

The Málaga duo have yet to race each other, they reveal in AS, but both form perhaps the most exciting team in la Liga at the moment with 11 goals scored and 11 conceded, making the Málaga the most prolific and leaky team in la Primera at the same time.

LLL Prediction - Away win

Osasuna (14th) v Levante (18th)

LLL has always considered itself to be part of the media élite. So it was a little concerned to read during the week, that it may have been partly responsible for the worrying mental state of one particular Scandinavian gentleman in this week’s News from Sweden, thanks to thelocal.se.

"A Swedish man returned from an extended vacation to find a massive hole in his living room wall. Charges have now been filed against the man’s neighbour, who said the “media elite” made him do it.

It was back in April of this year when the 67-year-old man returned to his apartment in Nyköping in eastern Sweden and discovered that several items were out of place, the Aftonbladet newspaper reports.

The man then found a gaping hole in the 25 centimetre thick concrete wall separating his flat from that of his 55-year-old neighbour.

“When I went up to the hole I could see into my neighbour’s,” the 67-year-old later told police.

It didn’t long for the man to deduce that his neighbour was responsible for carving out the crawlspace, but he was surprised to learn that the 55-year-old had made almost nightly trips into the 67-year-old’s apartment while he was away.

The 55-year-old, who is now facing charges for violating the domicile of another, admitted to police that he made the hole, but claimed that did it at the behest of the “media elite”, who had controlled him for years."

LLL Prediction - Home win

Barcelona (3rd) v Mallorca (11th)

Autumn is just around the corner, so it feels like the right time for Mallorca to change club president again. After all the Balearic club likes to stay in fashion and keep up to date with the latest trends having been through seven footballing fat cats in the past 22 months.

The latest to be jettisoned is Josep Pons who has got himself into a bit of a sticky situation - metaphorical for the moment, unless proved otherwise - with an employee at the Spanish embassy in Vienna, where Pons is the country’s ambassador but where he faces allegations of sexual harassment.

Pons has declared himself innocent and is most unhappy about his dismissal at Mallorca. “I have nothing to hide,” he declared

The latest president - perhaps supporting the latest haircut in fashion in Spain at the moment, the ever popular mullet - is Juame Cladera and will be in place until at least the spring presidential collection is due.

LLL Prediction - Away win

Real Madrid (4th) v Deportivo (19th)

The best defense faces the worst attack. Oh joy.

LLL Prediction - Home win (1-0)

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