Monday's Good Day, Bad Day - Round 37
"We Are De Champions" was the erroneous attempt at an English headline on the front page of Monday's Marca.
"We are in fourth place but will probably balls it up in the qualifying rounds" was the less catchy but more accurate banner that should have been published.
One man who refused to join in the jamboree after Atleti's 1-0 win over Deportivo and call their achievement a terrific triumph was the strangely subdued Javier Aguirre.
After the game, the Mexican manager merely muttered that he had "fulfilled his obligation" for the season. "They hired me to get into the Champions and we did it."
For this reason there was no celebrations at the Neptune statue, one block south of Cibeles, with Marca reporting on Saturday that it was only reserved for "celebrations not obligations."
It was a nervy affair at the CalderÃÂ³n with AtlÃÂ©tico nearly blowing it in the final moments when Deportivo hit a post when the now traditional chaos broke out in the rojiblanco back line.
But that's the way it had to be writes IÃÂ±aki DÃÂaz-Guerra in AS - "suffering to the end, the fans on the brink of a nervous breakdown, unable to watch the game and fearing a disaster."
And it looks like being repeated on a much grander scale next season. And amen to that.
Unless you are an AC Milan fan or the Zaragoza forward line, you gotta have a lot of love for dizzy old Jerzy Dudek. Having Bernabeu bench warmed all season, waiting for his moment of league glory, the Polish stopper did not disappoint with a fine display to shut out Sergio Garcia and co.
But 'come in Jerzy, your time is up!' as, third choice keeper, Jordi Codina is set to play next weekend's Levante game - if Levante turn up - firstly as a "deserved reward" according to Bernd Schuster and also to ensure that Iker Casillas' Zamora prize is not blown in a freakish goalfest.
Dudek: Rare cameo appearance for the Grobbelaar impersonator
Buoyed by the fact that he will almost certainly be leaving Mestalla over the summer and with the European Championships just around the corner, the Valencia striker has hit a bit of form of late with six goals in six games. Three of them were against Levante on Sunday mind, which takes the shine off the stats just a tad.
A cheeky point against Valladolid means Getafe are safe, La Liga Loca can sleep easier and world peace is restored. "Finally, it will be a week without pressure," sighed Michael Laudrup who is looking forward to a party against Betis next weekend - words you don't hear often.
His last gasp winner against Barcelona was dazzling Dani's 26th of the season in the league. And with Luis Fabiano picking up a suspension-inviting fifth yellow card against Betis, he is set to be the Primera Pichichi this season.
Unless someone force-feeds Raul an entire packet of Scooby Snacks before the final game of the season, that is.
GÃÂ¼iza: 26th league goal all-but-guarantees Pichichi
Two wins means that their Primera future is very much in their hands in the final round thanks to Zaragoza's draw against Real Madrid. But you wouldn't put it past at least one of them to cock it up next weekend though.
The Yellow Submarine are reproducing the same fantastic form which saw them win their last eight games in a row last season.
A 10-point lead over Barcelona means that the Catalan club have been well and truly owned by Manuel Pellegrini's men this season. The only thing missing is Joan Laporta on all fours being lead around on a dog leash. Now there's an image.
Not often you see this channel in the Good Day section, but the blog has enjoyed the Spanish version of Jeff Stelling all year - Patxi Alonso. Funny, irreverent, informed and always aware of what's going on. Unlike the half-wits on TVE-2.
The blog was even able to forgive AndrÃÂ©s Montes' commentary on Sunday (Robinho, Robinho, Robinho, HiguaÃÂn, HiguaÃÂn, HiguaÃÂn, long ball, long ball, long ball) when the channel started showing the goals from the other games as they happened during the Zaragoza v Real Madrid dust up.
But Alfredo RelaÃÂ±o, the editor of AS, was not happy at all as it ruined his viewing of the game - because no one likes watching goals, do they?
"It was a true shame," moaned angry Alfredo. And his discontent has nothing whatsoever to do with the fact that La Sexta did not have the rights to show the goals and the company that does also happens to own AS.
Well there goes the political career. The only people who would vote for Joan now are his family. And Pep Guardiola. The Barcelona president could not have looked more miserable on Sunday night had he been sat on a pressure mine next to Jimmy Saville.
Less than 40,000 turned up at the Camp Nou on Sunday and most of those were of a mind to thank Frank and give the BarÃÂ§a bigwig a barracking both before, during and after the match. The fact that the home side crashed to a last minute defeat did not improve their mood. "The worse ending possible," writes Josep Maria Casanovas in Sport.
His paper also report that every touch from Deco and Eto'o was booed after their supposed bottling of the Bernabeu battle.
Perhaps the only person to escape the Camp Nou with their dignity on Sunday was Frank Rijkaard who will always be a popular figure with the fans, despite his limitations towards the end of his reign.
"He has carried himself with professionalism, dignity, elegance, discretion and diplomacy," says Sport's LluÃÂs MascarÃÂ³. But the mauling by Mallorca was the saddest of ways for the Dutchman to bow out.
But as one banner in the Camp Nou declared - "Rijkaard: You'll never smoke alone."
No happy ending for Rijkaard in Nou Camp farewell
That was an absolute ball-wrencher of a game with Zaragoza repeating their kitchen sink hurling antics from the Deportivo encounter against the league champions who "did not play well, nor badly," but did enough to hold them to a draw.
And next up for Zaragoza? Mallorca away. Football can be a git sometimes.
Without a win in the last nine and just two goals scored. Three points from the last 27...
A rather limp end to the season and a home defeat to Sevilla means that it looks likely that the ever entertaining Paco Chaparro won't be in the Betis ejector seat next season.
"I have a project. But sometimes they are not possible," lamented poor Paco after the 0-2 loss.
They deserve a collective hug. Unpaid for two years and now thumped 5-1 at home by their city rivals. Over the weekend, most of the sides in the first and second divisions walked out carrying banners of support for the bottom of the table club.
It was a laudable action but support won't pay the bills. And for this reason, there are reports in Monday's press that Levante may not turn up for Real Madrid's championship party next weekend. Something that may finally make the league's bigwigs sit up and take notice of the lamentable affair of Levante.