Good Day, Bad Day: Ronaldo’s record and Quique’s adios to Atlético

Good Day

Cristiano Ronaldo

The usually dominant evil half of LLL would be tickled pink to see Cristiano Ronaldo whacking shot after shot over and beyond Almería’s goal in vain this weekend, as the apparently “not obsessed by beating the record” forward tries to move off the 38 goal mark - the historical tally held by Zarra and Hugo Sánchez.

Then again, abacus-spurning Marca have decided that’s Ronaldo has broken this record already after his free-kick brace against Villarreal in el Madrigal, so the Madrid man might as well enjoy a moment of happiness with a goal or two and yet more intensely irritating ‘baby’ celebrations that should see a yellow card every time they are performed.

Valencia, Levante

Valencia claimed a point in the derby against Levante which secured third, and yet the locals still weren’t happy, with the match report from Marca telling of boos for the players for not trying hard enough and jeers for the departing Vicente for being a bit of a stroppy so-and-so of late.

Levante’s point was also a handy one as it leaves them mathematically free of relegation worries in the final round, with Getafe and Real Sociedad facing one another and set to take points off each other no matter the result.

Cani

The Villarreal midfielder got to push the linesman in the chest and get away with it - although that was probably because the aforementioned official was standing on Cani’s foot during an altercation at the time. 

Freddie Kanouté

Two lovely headers from a lovely footballer who looked like he had played his final game at the Sánchez Pizjuán with steady Freddie contemplating a move to America in the summer. LLL reckons that Barcelona would make a fine, one season stop-off, for both the player and the Catalan club.

Athletic Bilbao, Málaga

A point apiece was enough to secure Athletic a European place and take away Málaga’s 0.004% chance of being relegated. The game also saw yet another soft penalty being given to the Basque team who have made a bit of habit of this over the past few seasons.

Quique Sánchez Flores

The Rojiblancos have been trying their level best to blow a European spot over the past few weeks, but even Atleti couldn’t manage to blow it on Sunday evening. Quique lead the players to a 2-1 win against Hércules in his final game at the Vicente Calderón and bid an emotional farewell to fans who stayed behind to call for the soon-to-be-ex Atlético boss to say a final adios.

“They made me feel happy here, and I appreciate it,” said the departing manager who has had quite enough of the insupportable interference that he had to endure at the Vicente Calderón despite delivering the Europa League trophy to his bungling bosses.

Sporting

If only it were possible to write in a sarcastic tone. Well, the blog’s going to try anyway...

Well done to Sporting for a much-deserved and fully unexpected victory against best buddies, Racing Santander - lead by the Sporting-supporting manager Marcelino, who confessed before the game that he would be happy to see both teams safe at the end of the season.

His less than outlandish eventually dream came true on Sunday, with Sporting running out 2-1 winners - although it looked in danger for a while thanks to a robust performance from the Racing’s stand-in goalkeeper Mario, who had perhaps not read the script...

Getafe

For sixty minutes Getafe’s clash with Osasuna was a game between an away team who seemed unwilling to score and a home side that were typically incapable of doing so. But then news of Zaragoza’s goal filtered through to the Getafe bench and two forward players were thrown on to help produce a 2-0 win. However, the Madrid club are still floating about on dangerous waters as are Osasuna after Sunday’s loss.

Deportivo

A very, very good time to play Barcelona and pick up what could be a hugely important point. And a very, very, good time for Deportivo to manage an eighth goalless draw this season. Deportivo may get lucky again next weekend with Valencia visiting Riazor with nothing to play for whatsoever.

Víctor Valdés

From what LLL could tell after a session of bleary-eyed highlight-studying on Monday morning, Víctor Valdés was the only Dream Boy to function as per manufacturer’s specifications at the Camp Nou, having made two good stops from what appeared to be Deportivo’s only two chances.

Zaragoza

Hell’s bells, Zaragoza were a cricket’s crotch away from being three points adrift in the relegation zone, after all the affairs of Sunday night. Javier Aguirre’s men were 1-0 up after a superbly-struck effort from the superbly-named Ponzio but Espanyol’s Alvaro contrived to hit a header from one yard across the face of goal - where it was missed again - instead of knocking it into an open goal with ten minutes left. “I don’t understand how it wasn’t a goal,” admitted a relieved Zaragoza coach.

Almería

Four points in the last two home games for the relegated club with a draw against Villarreal and now a win over Mallorca but a combined total of just 10,000 fans to see it.

Bad Day

Diego Forlán

The Uruguayan suffered yet more humiliation this weekend, after being dropped from the Atlético squad on the morning of the Hércules game after a week of handbags and huffing with Quique Sánchez Flores.

Espanyol

The 1-1 draw for Zaragoza and victories for Sevilla and Atlético Madrid sees Espanyol’s attempts to cling onto a European place after being in the top spots for 25 rounds this season end in failure.

“The season was a good one overall, but now there’s only disappointment,” admitted Mauricio Pochettino.

Mallorca

Just one win in the last eight leaves Mallorca dragging themselves desperately towards the finish line like Maniche after a 200m dash. Sunday’s somewhat surprising 3-1 defeat by Almería sees Mallorca probably needing a point against Atlético next week to avoid what would still be an unlikely drop even if they were to lose. Or something like that...

Real Sociedad

A ninth consecutive away defeat in the league for Real Sociedad sees the Basque team needing at least a point against Getafe to guarantee avoiding slipping straight back to la Segunda. Prepare for much talk of ‘finals’ for the San Sebastian club, this week.

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