Premier Sketch: Hat-tricks, Christmas cards & sexism
The top end of the table saw mixed fortunes for the two Manchester clubs this weekend; United continued to astound everyone with their unbeaten run, with opponents Birmingham City giving them a helping hand in the opening minutes.
The BluesÃ¢ÂÂ defence went missing quicker than Harry RedknappÃ¢ÂÂs wallet, allowing Bulgarian striker Dimitar Berbatov to show fellow forward Wayne Rooney how ittÃ¢ÂÂs done with another hat trick.
But it wasnÃ¢ÂÂt just the Blues defence who were in a generous mood; it was such a stroll for United that Alex Ferguson even decided to give part time footballer Michael Owen a run out. HeÃ¢ÂÂs just so thoughtful you know.
Things werenÃ¢ÂÂt so rosy for Roberto ManciniÃ¢ÂÂs City at Villa Park, as once again an error from keeper Joe Hart cost City all three points and gifted Aston Villa a much-needed win.
Debutant Darren Bent snatched the winner which no doubt will make up for being struck off Steve BruceÃ¢ÂÂs Christmas card list. Bruce spent the week bent out of shape and IÃ¢ÂÂm not just talking about his nose; apparently Bent should have shown him a little more respect and stayed at Sunderland.
You can be sure that fans of Sheffield United, Wigan, Huddersfield, Crystal Palace, and Wigan again will be feeling plenty of sympathy with their former boss.
ThereÃ¢ÂÂs a good chance that FIFA will be calling SkyÃ¢ÂÂs Richard Keys and Andy Gray after their Ã¢ÂÂOff airÃ¢ÂÂ comments about Sian Massey, the female refereeÃ¢ÂÂs assistant at Molineux for the visit of Liverpool, but Sepp Blatter probably wonÃ¢ÂÂt be berating the sexist duo, heÃ¢ÂÂll be giving them a firm handshake and asking them out for a drink.
According to SkyÃ¢ÂÂs top football presenters, women shouldnÃ¢ÂÂt be allowed anywhere near football as they donÃ¢ÂÂt have a clue about the offside rule; one of the things that they seem to be forgetting is that Howard Webb and his male counterparts are ridiculed by fans, commentators, players, and managers for their mistakes and dreadful decisions in the Premier League almost every week.
Kenny DalglishÃ¢ÂÂs daughter Kelly Cates, who has more knowledge of football than Richard Keys in her little finger gave this tremendous response on Twitter after the game, Ã¢ÂÂPhew am exhausted, just read about something called 'the offside ruleÃ¢ÂÂ. Too much for my tiny brain. Must be damaged from nail polish fumes.Ã¢ÂÂ
But all in all it was a great weekend for the Dalglish family; LiverpoolÃ¢ÂÂs 3-0 victory at Molyneux was their first win under DalglishÃ¢ÂÂs reign, or as some journalists spun it Ã¢ÂÂDalglishÃ¢ÂÂs first win as a Liverpool manager for 20 years.Ã¢ÂÂ
This dipping volley from Raul Meireles was without doubt the goal of the weekendÃ¢ÂÂ¦