La Liga Loca has not been to the water-starved city of Barcelona for a while but it can only imagine that its pickpocket-invested streets are full of cranky culés with faces longer than Ruud van Nistelrooy on a caravanning holiday with Marco van Basten.
If polls in Sport are to be believed - which they probably shouldn't be - then the local Barça support are still a fairly depressed bunch despite some promising movements and rumblings in the summer transfer market.
The biggest cause of certain still appears to be the appointment of Pep Guardiola who was unveiled as the Barcelona manager on Tuesday. Before the presentation took place, only 17% of those answering an online poll claimed to be doing the cancan in celebration of Pep's brave new world. Instead, 27% were confessing their distinct lack of faith in the future.
However, that figure had picked up considerably once Pep had revealed his plans for Barcelona's new footballing future with lots of touchy-feeling talk of 'feeling' and 'passion'.
Guardiola gets press pack allgooey-eyed at his unveiling
Joan Laporta boasted that his new yes-man "has got character, class, knowledge and love for the club." And responds well to hypnosis, perhaps.
The local press in the Kingdom of Catalunya all fell into line to applaud the presentation with Santi Nolla writing in Mundo Deportivo that "if one of his objectives was to transmit confidence, he managed it."
The paper then had a bit of a mad moment by printing a story claiming that LA Galaxy were to launch a 26million euro bid for Ronaldinho and would pay him 16million a year.
Sport's Joan Batlle opined that "the most important thing is to break bad habits and open the windows for fresh air" - although the last time someone attempted that at the Camp Nou, Joan Laporta got his laptop nicked - the same laptop containing the launch codes for his satellite death ray - explaining the fair amount of dissent being tolerated in the local press.
Even Marca got onboard Pep's love-train by writing in its editorial that the "power would be taken away from the dressing room" - although that does lead to an open question on how Rafa Marquez will be able to charge up his Remington beard trimmer.
La Liga Loca, for one, is feeling very underwhelmed by Getafe's latest managerial appointment. Normally, the club chooses hot young studs like Bernd Schuster and Quique Sanchez Flores. Instead, the club has picked the Spanish equivalent of Bryan Robson as their new big cheese.
The new man at the helm is Victor Muñoz who, as far as the blog can recall, has either been fired from or walked out of his last few jobs - including his most recent post at Recreativo.
Victor Muñoz: Spain's equivalent of Bryan Robson
Valencia have begun the season as they mean to go on. By squabbling. This week it was Vice President, Vicente Soriano who was in full ranting mode by accusing majority shareholder, Juan Bautista Soler of being "the worst in history."
"Each euro that he wastes hurts me as a fan and also affects me economically, because 10% of the club's capital is mine," roared Soriano as the Betis bound Ever Banega sauntered past.
His comrade in the Mestalla boardroom, president AgustÃÂn Morea has fended off global interest in the striking services of David Villa by saying that he is staying in Valencia next season, leading to the theory that the club will instead be offering up JoaquÃÂn and David Silva to interested suitors to help balance the overcooked books.
It seems that Mallorca may well be in financial dodo after the company which holds 93% of their shares, Binipuntiró, suspended all payments due to one or two operating difficulties. However, the lawyer to the Ono Estadi president, Vicente Grande says that "the club has no economic problems."
Especially after David Güiza got tarted up with a bit of lipstick and prodded into the footballing equivalent of a cattle market.
