More Mestalla mudslinging - and the blog needs YOU!
Everything has a good and a bad side. Except David Bisbal.
The housing bubble burst is set to cause bankruptcies and repossessions and all the misery that walks hand in hand with that kind of business.
But on the happier side, the crunching credit crisis is preventing braying, second-home-in-Cornwall City types from boasting to La Liga Loca that you can never lose money in property.
'Try telling that to the gaggle of football club owning construction magnates in Spain', is the blog's reply to such crazy talk. Whilst battering the brace-wearing buffoons around the head with a copy of The Economist.
To be genuinely stinking rich in Spain - at least on paper - you had to have had your snout buried deeply in the construction industry trough for the past few years. But it's a trough that is pretty much empty these days, and this is starting to have an impact in the game in Spain. VicenÃÂ§ Grande, for instance, is looking to put Mallorca up for sale by flogging off his 93% shareholding. There are rumblings on the east coast - and it isn't Juan Bautista Soler's stomach signalling lunch time - that his construction clan may be looking to get out of the football business due to a lack of a pot to p*ss in.
Koeman and Joaquin: "Your mother."
The other rumblings in Valencia are coming from JoaquÃÂn's demonic direction. The ex-international winger has had steam shooting out of his ears for the past couple of days having heard the comments Ronald Koeman concerning his many happy months in Mestalla. "It was a mistake to sign for Valencia," admitted Koeman, whose 'mistake' has made him considerably richer. The Dutch dole-queuer went on to say that Angulo, CaÃÂ±izares and Albeda were creating a bad atmosphere after being dropped and were being supported by team-mates like JoaquÃÂn. "Players like these cost 30 million Euros and now have a value of thirty euros," boasted Koeman on his uncanny managerial abilities.
"In five months, he destroyed the team and now he has the shame to talk from his own country," squeaked JoaquÃÂn in riposte. "He was only concerned with having five or six bottles of wine with his dinner," continued the former Betis man, while his libel lawyer banged his head against the wall.
The next man to be fired from the Valencia post, six months in, having had a fall-out with the players/crowd/owners, is 13-year-old Jim'll Fix It winner and AlmerÃÂa coach Unai Emery, who is set to sign a two-year deal with the club according to both AS and Marca.
Meanwhile, Diving Dani Alves has completed his Barcelona job interview with Sport. The want-away defender invited the paper's hacks into his house to be grilled on topics such as "What do you think you'll find at BarÃÂ§a?" "What do you think about Pep Guardiola?" and "Do you like to go out at night?" However, it seems that Alves won't be going anywhere until tough talking JosÃÂ© Maria del Nido gets a big splash of cash for him. "We have rejected offers of over 25 million Euros for Alves," confirmed the Sevilla president, hinting that the Brazilian international sadly won't be on parade at Portman Road next season.
Racing Santander had an O.C. moment on Tuesday with tears and hugs all round between the departing Marcelino and club president Francisco PernÃÂa. The Manchester City-linked coach confessed that he told his boss of his decision to run away from Racing two months ago, saying that he wanted to move to a big club. "The doors of Racing and I think of all Cantabrians will be forever open to him," sobbed PernÃÂa, as he hung onto Marcelino's ankles.
Blissfully ignoring the realities of his situation is newly-relegated Real Zaragoza owner Agapito Iglesias, who has boasted that his club's strong pecuniary position means that all is rosy at La Romareda. "The club does not need to sell a single player to get by," beamed the second division bigwig, completely ignoring the fact that many of his squad may not fancy spending the next couple of years of their lives taking on the likes of Eibar.
And a special mention must go to this gem of a question from Spanish TV channel Cuatro to the Muslim Mahamadou Diarra: "Is it true you've never had ham?"
Diarra: "Hmm, I wonder..."
LA LIGA LOCA NEEDS YOU!
Rather than having the blog twittering away on the best and worst of another year of La Liga, why not ask you - the people who know a whole lot more - to do it?
To vent your spleen, just add a comment at the bottom of the blog. To get the juices flowing here's the insane rantings of Paul from Barcelona, representing Espanyol.
Best team - Strange one this. The best team I've seen all season was Espanyol: they destroyed four of the top five with sublime football, especially against Villarreal and AtlÃÂ©tico and for 20 minutes against Zaragoza were as good as anything BarÃÂ§a, Madrid and Sevilla have produced in recent years. But the best away team I've seen were Recre. They destroyed us. Lightning-quick passing and movement. Should have won by six.
Worst team - Easy this one, Espanyol. What a shambles. Like they'd never met before. No passion, no organisation. The worst team I've seen were Athletic. Rubbish to a man. Though they improved as it went on. We didn't. But then again Valencia were garbage too. But they won something.
Best player (Espanyol) - Pablo Zabaleta by a mile. The only player who never gave up. As popular as Tamudo. Too good for us though. Next year he'll be elsewhere.
Best player (Others) - This hurts but it has to be Leo Messi. Killed us at home, though he was up against Clemente.
Worst player (Espanyol) - A lot to choose from but step forward Messi's bitch Clemente RodrÃÂquez. Worth a goal start to the opposition.
Worst player (Opposition) - Probably some one who played for Murcia, but I'll be buggered if I can remember his name.
Best goal - Obvious really, Tamudo's wonder chip against Real Madrid.
Team of the year - Toss-up between Racing and AlmerÃÂa. Racing played the better football, but... AlmerÃÂa in the top 10?!
Best away fans - Betis. Loads of them and made a load of noise. No trouble at all. Unlike at home, of course.
Worst away fans - Sang during a minute's silence, threw a flare into a family section, made no noise, were a disgrace. You know who they are. Strangely disappeared against Celtic and Rangers.
Fan moment of the year - That idiot at Camp Nou with his A4 paper with biro writing on it shouting at Rijkaard, who was 80 meters away, to read his paper.