Spain lose 'the final that never was'

See. Even when La Liga Loca is completely wrong, it’s right. While the blog was suggesting that the Argentina v Spain friendly was the flounciest of flimflams, something to tune into if there was nothing better to do of a Tuesday night, a channel-filler during the normal 35 minute blocks of adverts on TV and a chance to swoon at Santi Cazorla’s little hamster face, the Spanish press was happily hyping the game into something that resembled a meaningful game of football. “The final that never was!” yelled Marca on Tuesday, rubbing its metaphorical hands in glee at the prospect of a match between South African sensations and South African saps. But after a Monumental spanking for Spain so severe that it would have brought tears even to Wayne Rooney’s eyes, Marca has now downgraded the clash from ‘The Final That Never Was!’ to ‘The Match That Didn’t Mean That Much Anyway. No. Honestly. You Know. Friendlies and Stuff (Sniff).’“It was too much punishment,” complained Wednesday’s not caring, but caring really front page which dismissed Spain's 4-1 pummeling by claiming; “the game was a friendly for la Roja but it was a final for Argentina,” - a notion that even a blog as behind-the-times and more than a little...slow...as LLL stablemate Argie Bargy came to realise the day before.Vicente Del Bosque’s third defeat as Spanish manager was one that will have taught the team - the same team who ARE EUROPEAN AND WORLD CHAMPIONS AND DON’T NEED ONE, YOU KNUCKLEHEADS - a lesson, tutted the paper’s editorial. “Everyone will be waiting for us in every game, whether it is a friendly or not,” wrote Marca climbing onto its high horse, giving it a smack on the arse with a photo of Cristiano Ronaldo and riding off into the sunset. Considering that Del Bosque’s job over the past few months was to win the World Cup and start the 2012 European Championship qualification process with a victory  over Liechtenstein - a task that he’s achieved - LLL feels that the paper is being more than a tad harsh. AS are leaning in that direction too with Alfredo Relaño wondering whether what was basically an exercise to win the Argentinean vote in the 2018 World Cup poll was worth the Tuesday afternoon tonking. “It wasn’t worth giving away our prestige,” sighed the paper’s editor. The match was very much a win-win situation for the Barcelona-barmy press with ten of the club’s players in action in the encounter meaning that their writers were able to adopt a very Dennis Law playing for both sides attitude to the game. Considering the Barcelona born and bred, hometown hero David Villa failed to find the scoresheet for the visitors, both main papers chose to pay tribute to Gonzalo Higuaín and his lovely goal. Not really. Heck, not even the pro-Real Madrid press went for that crazy option. Instead it was Leo Messi who was seen as the King of the Hill. “Monumental Messi!” said the pot-banging Sport, who also accused Spain of not taking the game as seriously as the Argentineans did. “The difference was huge, an abyss,” ranted Josep María Casanovas - a scolding that could swiftly be curtailed by a “show us yer medals” response from Del Bosque’s boys. Mundo Deportivo also went for the Messi-madness option with their declaration of “Mucho Messi!” before shuffling off and returning to its normal business of flogging official Barcelona adult nappies. What was a big, juicy clash against Argentina will be quickly be reduced to the merest of blips with the Spanish press moving their gaze back to la Liga and the normal old nonsense. Indeed, Marca are off the mark first with their cooing that Real Madrid’s record €450m budget for the new season sees the club as a glorious "money-making machine." It’s like Tuesday never really happened, really.

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