John Foster
Latest articles by John Foster

Umlauts mysteriously vanishing, survey reveals
By John Foster last updated
Back of the Net An in-depth survey has revealed a sharp decline in umlaut numbers across the country, to the surprise and alarm of punctuation officials...

Back of the Net's guide to Brazil's 2014 World Cup stadia
By John Foster last updated
Back of the Net John Foster tells you everything you need to know about this summer's sites of glory in Brazil...

Back of the Net's alternative World Cup 2002: Pants, b*llix, buffets and besmirched integrity
By John Foster last updated
Back of the Net A sideways glance at Korea and Japan 2002 from Back of the Net

World wondering if Greece might break up into smaller countries that aren’t Greece
By John Foster last updated
Back of the Net Greece are finally out of the World Cup, writes John Foster, leading millions of football fans to wonder if there might be some way of making sure they never play at a World Cup again...

Weird game of football features two players, tiny balls, rackets
By John Foster last updated
Back of the Net Fans around the country have reported sightings of an ersatz version of football that bears little resemblance to the game they know and love, writes Back of the Net's John Foster...

PSG win Qatar derby
By John Foster last updated
Back of the Net Goals from Neymar and Lionel Messi were not enough to prevent Qatari superclub Barcelona from slipping up against Paris Saint-Germain, reports Back of the Net's John Foster...

Shaw to make decision on haircut imminently
By John Foster last updated
Back of the Net Southampton starlet will decide in the next few days whether he has short hair or long hair, writes John Foster...

Poyet hoping Wickham will be like a completely different signing
By John Foster last updated
Back of the Net Black Cats chief hoping for fresh start for recalled Leeds loanee, writes John Foster...

Arteta refuses to celebrate against current club
By John Foster last updated
Back of the Net Mikel Arteta refused to celebrate rounding off the scoring in Everton’s 3-0 defeat of Arsenal, out of respect for the club where he has been playing his football since 2011.

Nigel Reo-Coker somehow not a QPR player
By John Foster last updated
Back of the Net Even the former Wimbledon, West Ham and Bolton man is confused, writes John Foster...

Man singing in kebab shop at 3am almost certainly Sam Allardyce
By John Foster last updated
Back of the Net West Ham manager Sam Allardyce has taken to frequenting the Walthamstow Kebab Dungeon in the early hours, reports Back of the Net...

Andorrans object to playing Wales in Euro 2016 qualifier
By John Foster last updated
Back of the Net The Andorran FA has filed a complaint after being forced to play somewhere that doesn't even belong in the European Championship, writes John Foster...

Unidentifiable guy at party claims he plays for Fulham
By John Foster last updated
Back of the Net A young, athletic-looking man at a social gathering has been telling everyone he plays for Fulham Football Club, writes John Foster...

New Dortmund signing given Bayern shirt to save time
By John Foster last updated
Back of the Net The Bavarian behemoths are cutting out the middleman, as John Foster reports...

Phrase ‘golden generation’ linked conclusively to quarter-final exit
By John Foster last updated
Back of the Net Researchers have presented compelling evidence that any side lauded as a ‘golden generation’ will inevitably fail to progress beyond the last eight, reports Back of the Net's John Foster.

Leeds owner Cellino believes 17-stone goalkeepers are unlucky
By John Foster last updated
Back of the Net Leeds United have dismissed goalkeeper Paddy Kenny because of new owner Massimo Cellino’s superstitions, reports John Foster...

Every football fan coincidentally an expert on Balkan politics
By John Foster last updated
Back of the Net More or less every football fan in Britain is also a well-informed historian, sociologist or foreign policy expert specialising in south-eastern Europe, Back of the Net can reveal...

Watford losing patience with Jokanovic
By John Foster last updated
Back of the Net Vicarage Road sources have strongly hinted that manager Slavisa Jokanovic might be about to lose his job, report Back of the Net...

MLS has no idea why all the good Americans are returning
By John Foster last updated
Back of the Net John Foster with the latest on a busy time for Toronto FC...

West Brom and Everton players pause mid-game to contemplate flight of a seagull
By John Foster last updated
Back of the Net Bird stopped play at The Hawthorns on Monday night, writes John Foster...

Inter's Stramaccioni to return to being a kind of cheese
By John Foster last updated
Back of the Net An unusual next step for an unusual Inter manager...

Wilson Palacios named Back Of The Net's Player of the Year
By John Foster last updated
Back of the Net Gongs given out in BotN's annual awards

Biting not offensive in South America, claims Luis Suarez
By John Foster last updated
Back of the Net Calm down, it was all just a big misunderstanding...
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