There's only one team in Manchester?

Barcelona yesterday sent an internal memo to staff instructing them not to refer to Manchester United merely as 'Manchester'. The memo stated that 'Manchester' should be referred to as 'Manchester United' at all times, explaining that there was another club in Manchester called "Manchester City."

Hearing that made me smile and it offered respite from the barrage of requests ahead of UnitedâÂÂs forthcoming Champions League semi final with the Catalans. HereâÂÂs one text I got within minutes of United beating Roma on Wednesday.

âÂÂHi mate. Not spoke for a while. Any chance of four tickets for Barca? Main stand ideally.âÂÂ

IâÂÂd not spoken to the texter in question for as many years as he was asking for tickets and was tempted to reply with: âÂÂAnything else? Do you want me to fix it for Ronaldinho to pick you up from the airport with a scantily clad Melissa Theuriau in the back of his motor?âÂÂ

Theuriau: Free when you buy four tickets to Man United. Maybe

United have never played Barca in the seven years since I started spending the majority of my time in Catalonia. I get to watch both clubs play around 25 times a season â mainly Barca at home and United away. IâÂÂve always wanted to see the pair meet, more so at the moment because United are just that and Barca are divided. Two years ago, Barca would have been clear favourites to beat United. Now, the opposite is true.

IâÂÂve tried to limit the requests by putting all the information I know on United We StandâÂÂs website, but it has only been partly successful and they go on â requests for hotels, tickets, beers and to meet my girlfriendâÂÂs fit mates.

I interviewed the Barca president Joan Laporta in his office for FourFourTwo around the same time I last spoke to the texter. He was illustrating a point about BarcaâÂÂs global following and asked me to look at his laptop. As he did, he tried unsuccessfully to close down an email from America, which I nosily read.

âÂÂHi Joan,â it said. âÂÂAre you still a big Barca fan? Great season so far! WeâÂÂre hoping to catch a game at the Camp Nou soon and wondered if you could help us obtain match tickets? There will be 16 of us.âÂÂ

The sender hadnâÂÂt realised that since they last met Laporta had become club president. He could fix tickets, but much as IâÂÂd like to help fellow Reds out for the semi final, I canâÂÂt.

Laporta: still a big Barca fan... as president 

Week in week out, I help people get tickets for Barca matches. I usually meet friends and friends of friends (there were over 40 people who I didnâÂÂt know for one game in October). I know where the touts go, converse with them in Spanish and make sure the visitors donâÂÂt get ripped off or buy seats in the gods.

IâÂÂve never made a penny and in seven years IâÂÂve never failed to get a person in. Actually, there were three raffish young Mancunians who wanted tickets for Barca vs Madrid two years ago. It was getting close to kick off and, after sorting everybody else out, I searched for a bargain. I found one.

An elderly fan had three spare seats and wanted â¬50 a piece â a bargain given that others had paid between â¬100-150. I relayed the news to the lads as an editor called and told me that he wanted an 800 word match report by the final whistle. IâÂÂd not even entered the Camp Nou. I was then stunned when one of the lads said: âÂÂFifty Euros is ok, but weâÂÂre hoping for three for fiftyâ¦âÂÂ

ItâÂÂs harder to help out for big European games. Demand for tickets is even higher than the Madrid game, partly because of the substantial followings British clubs bring. And with the final being in Moscow, some United fans are seeing the semi as a surrogate final, knowing that the visa and ticket issues could make reaching the Russian capital difficult.

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