Spain ready for most important date

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The dead from the waist up LLL doesn’t really get excited about anything that doesn’t involve zombies. Or grapes. Or both.

However, the blog must confess that it had a sleepless Tuesday night. And that wasn’t just because it was about 1000 degrees in the Spanish capital, but because if Del Bosque’s boys beat Germany today, then frackin’ Spain will be in the frackin’ World Cup final with a very good chance of winning it against the jammy frackin Dutch!

And that is about the most thrilling thing that has happened here since Andalusia had its first inside toilet installed way back in 2007.

If the celebrations after doing one over the Dutch, on Sunday, are even as half as insane as those for the Euro 2008 win, then every fountain in the land will have a good 1000 pogo-ing people dancing in it and no bin will remain unburned.

Unfortunately, for all that to pass then Germany are going to have to be beaten. And for all the articles being written and pundits opining, no-one really has any clue what is going to happen in Wednesday’s semi-final clash, so it’s no wonder that the footballing world has been looking to an octopus for guidance.

And speaking of creepy, hairless organisms that shoot ink whenever threatened, Luis Aragonés has also been probed thoroughly for his views on the titanic Teutonic clash.

Despite being publicly told to shut his cakehole by the Marca director, Eduardo Inda, earlier in the tournament after criticising La Roja’s performances, the former Spain boss has now been given all the space he needs in the paper to ruminate on Wednesday’s clash - a cogitation that ended with the prediction that “I think Spain will go through (squirt, squirt).”

Inda agrees and has already begun taunting Sunday’s possible opponents with the jibe, “great! Holland are in the final, so what?” “If we go through tonight then we are champions,” predicts Marca’s main man attempting to match the paper’s genius “Zidane, we are going to retire you, tonight” boast from the 2006 World Cup clash against France.

In Wednesday’s editorial, the jar marked hyperbole has been as left as empty as Guti’s brain with the paper claiming that “we are at the most important date in Spanish football. La Roja are on the cusp of glory, and just two steps away from becoming legends.”

The vibe as AS more of concern that confidence and are quite rightly fretting over the footballing prowess of Germany with the paper’s editor Alfredo Relaño noting that “we call the Germans squareheads because deep down we envy their virtues.”

Both Schweinsteiger and Villa appear on the front cover with the Spain man trying to look mean and moody but instead giving the impression that he has trapped wind.

Wednesday’s edition also helpfully points out that there are 400,000 Germans living in Spain, but disappointedly fails to print their addresses as a handy guide as the nearest person taunt should la Roja prevail.

The Catalan papers may have joined in the hype over the clash a little bit more enthusiastically, but have discovered that their beloved Barcelona are broke with new president, Sandro Rosell admitting that he has “found a club that is indebted” and has had to borrow €150m from a credit syndicate to pay June’s bills.

However, Sport's Josep María Casanovas still has his eyes on the prize in Durban and says that “we have the players, the team and the ambition. There is no fear of Germany, on the contrary Germany respect us now.”

Aside from thoughts of becoming legends, touching glory and making history, the theme in Spain on the day of their semi-final dust-up is indecision when looking to who will be the winner.

Which is why LLL will be spending the final hours before the clash doing what everyone else is doing by pacing the streets going “SPAIN! No, Germany. SPAIN!, No Germany. SPAIN! No, Germany...”

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