Atlético Madrid - Champions of Europe?
Now regular readers may think that La Liga Loca has been at the Tuesday turps again. Or has, rojiblanco club president, Enrique Cerezo threatening to strap the blog down in front of a movie he has produced.
Nevertheless, it has a genuine, sneaky feeling that Atlético Madrid are going to do very, very well in this seasonâÂÂs Champions League. WeâÂÂre talking semi-final well.*
Now this bold declaration of faith flies in the footballing face of just about every sleight, slur and insult hurled at the Calderón club by the blog over the past couple of years in regards to AtléticoâÂÂs less than admirable antics.
But that was all aimed at the league version of the club - the half-arsed, canâÂÂt be bothered to defend for 90 minutes, bottling part. And it was for its own good.
This seasonâÂÂs super-duper Champions League version has been a very different beast, indeed - cool, calm, collected and a Steven Gerrard dive from topping their group.
Gerrard robs rojiblancos of top spot
In just a few hours, Atleti are taking on Porto in a very favourable draw indeed, simply because of the scientific fact that La Liga Loca hasnâÂÂt really heard of many of the opposition players.
Just Hulk, really. And only because he has a funny name. But not as funny as the legendary Benfica keeper, Quim.
AS are in the blogâÂÂs camp of optimism too due their outstanding, jaw-dropping revelation that the Atleti manager has made the effort of studying the opposition. âÂÂAbel is now working on a full written report,â informed the paper admiringly on Monday.
The new Atleti manager whose record to date is one win, one draw and one defeat has come up with a cunning plan on how to move past his Portuguese opponents and face Villarreal (maybe) in the next round.
âÂÂIf you win the first game, then itâÂÂs harder for them to come back,â revealed the secret-giving stand-in.
Barcelona are also looking for a way back to the light on Tuesday by taking on Lyon.
However, the talk in the city is still over their 2-1 home defeat to Espanyol, although Sport have attempted to raise the spirits of the culé collective with TuesdayâÂÂs headline of âÂÂattack! attack! attack!âÂÂ
But this fails to trump their rivals exclusive âÂÂTop Confidentialâ report from the previous day when Mundo Deportivo whispered that, âÂÂPep Guardiola told his team they had his complete confidence and satisfaction for their performance against Espanyol.âÂÂ
"Two defeats in 24... calm down, calm down"
Get FourFourTwo Newsletter
The best features, fun and footballing quizzes, straight to your inbox every week.
To show what a very peculiar Catalan club this is, Dutch overlord, Johan Cruyff even wrote that he was âÂÂhappyâ about the defeat and that it came at a good time.
Moving away from one type of champions talk to another and TuesdayâÂÂs Marca is predicting that, the Turkey-living titan, Dani Güiza will be dropped from la SelecciónâÂÂs next squad, due to WAG issues.
Now the former Mallorca man has a bit of a reputation in Spain as a ladies man and is perhaps one of the few football players to have slept with his agent (and wife) - in this case, the famous Nuria Bermudéz
And this makes him a bit of a target for âÂÂla prensa rosaâ - a flowery name for the low-life, celebrity-obsessed reporting which dominates the countryâÂÂs magazines and television schedules.
They were in force at SpainâÂÂs training camp for the match against England, keeping their beady eyes on Güiza.
And if this wasnâÂÂt upsetting enough for Vicente del Bosque, the Fenerbahce playerâÂÂs ex-wife revealed that she spent the night with the footballer before the clash took place.
âÂÂI had some drinks and he had a couple of beers,â revealed Rocio Aranda.
Now it must take something special for AS to remove the traditional picture of the nudey lady from their back pages.
For the past few weeks itâÂÂs a spot that seems to have been dominated by big-busted broads that Jermain Defoe has shagged, is currently shagging, or is about to shag. But not on Tuesday.
"Hey, no picture of my former, current or future squeeze?"
ThatâÂÂs because the paper has decided to bore the pants of its dwindling readers with a back page devoted to sales statistics. And so has Marca.
The latter boasts that it has increased its figures over its rival, but AS fight back with the stunning statistic that the paper sells more copies in 14 provinces of Spain and four autonomous communities.
La Liga Loca is about to conduct a test on which makes the most useful for absorbing cat pee. It suspects that it may be a tie.
*If you happen to be reading this around 10.30 on Tuesday night and Atlético have been thumped 4-0, the blog is, of course, just joking.
---------------------------------------------
FourFourTwo.com: More to read...
La Liga Loca home
Blogs home
Latest Spain news
News home
Interviews home
Forums home
FourFourTwo.com home
How the Nations League overcame doubters to become a valuable international football fixture
‘I wanted another Italian at Sheffield Wednesday so that Carbone had a friend. We went to sign Di Canio from Celtic and he didn’t turn up, the bastard!’: Ex-Sheffield Wednesday manager recalls transfer issue with controversial forward