Spanish stars begin their moving and shaking
Now that the sultry stickiness of the Spanish summer has finally landed like a sweat-filled piano, it's high time for the good people of Andalusia to take up their favourite pastimes - intensive thumb twiddling and illegally reclassifying public land to sell off to construction industry buddies for cash bonanza kick backs.
However, Sevilla for one, have gone against this stereotyping grain and have moved quicker than Ronaldinho at last orders to ensure that the Keita and Alves sized holes in their squad have been filled with suitable replacements.
The Andalusian club have got their mitts on Genoa right-back, Adboulay Konko for a cheeky 9 million euros and the Marseille born defender says that he couldn't be more ready for a stunning season of Primera action.
Konko arrives from Genoa to fill Dani Alves' amply-sized boots
"To be honest, I only know about about three or four teams," admitted Konko. "Don't worry," soothes La Liga Loca, that has never stopped Sky Sports' Spanish coverage. Or Marca.
Sevilla's other move to paper over the cracks left by their Barcelona bound battlers is the arrival of midfielder, Christian Koffi Ndri or 'Romaric' from Le Mans for around 8 million euros.
Over the weekend, Marca hinted that there were some behind the scenes bother at Betis with Darth de Lopera less than happy at Paco Chaparro's ongoing insistence of poo-pooing all his transfer hints.
The paper says that Paco only has his beady eyes set on players who will improve the current squad - which means that his boss' suggestions of Peter Luccin was turfed out of the suggestion box and into the bin where it rightly belongs.
One player who wants to leave the Spanish capital appears to be Rafael Sobis who, all things considered, has done bugger all in two years to justify his 9 million euro fee.
"He wants to know what's going on with his situation," barked the striker's agent, Jorge Machado as he prepared for a meeting with de Lopera armed only with holy water and a legion of vampire slayers.
"He has offers from Ukraine, Italy and Monaco," boasted the soon to be beheaded Machado on his client's glittering future.
Sobis: Keen to escape de Lopera's vampire lair
AtlÃÂ©tico Madrid are still trying to work on their own ins and outs - not of the naughty Maniche variety - and are looking to offload Eller, Reyes and Seitaridis, amongst many others.
One of those is boy-band lookalike, ZÃÂ© Castro, a player who sees his departure from the CalderÃÂ³n as a win-win situation for everyone.
"I've expressed my desire to leave the team, but I still have a contract," mused the defender, "I've not played much and if it stays the same, it won't be good for me."
Ridding themselves of JosÃÂ© Antonio Reyes will be another mighty challenge for the rojiblancos with the Spanish market for whining, manager-abusing, red card attracting prima donna's fairly small. Until Sergio Ramos is sold to Chelsea, anyway.
Club president, Enrique Cerezo, had promised some 'surprises' with his signings this summer. La Liga Loca's hopeful guess of Matthew Broderick seems to be wide of the mark with Mundo Deportivo claiming that the downright weird Julio Baptista will be moving across town whilst AS are plumping for Werder Bremen's permanently want-away Brazilian, Diego.