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12. Andres the lucky charm
Andres Iniesta has scored some important goals in his illustrious career, not least the 2010 World Cup Final winner for Spain against the Netherlands, and the late strike that knocked Chelsea out of the Champions League semi-finals in 2009.
Remarkably, the midfielder has now scored 55 club and 12 international goals – that's 67 in total, mathematicians – and not one of them has come in a defeat. The only time he's been on the losing side in a game he scored came way back in February 2003; a 2-1 Segunda defeat for Barcelona B.
11. The curse of Ryoichi Maeda
Ryoichi Maeda is a deadly finisher in more ways than one. For six seasons straight between 2007 and 2012, the team he scored his first goal of the season against were relegated from the J-League.
The former Japan international, at the time playing for Jubilo Iwata, sent Ventforet Kofu, Tokyo Verdy, Jef United Chiba, Kyoto Sanga, Motedio Yamagata and Gamba Osaka on their way to a tumble through the trap door to J2 – the latter having finished in the top three for the previous three campaigns.
10. You plonker, Rodders
Jack Rodwell started 39 Premier League matches - 37 for Sunderland - without tasting victory until the Black Cats' 4-0 win at Crystal Palace in February 2017 – a match in which he came off at half-time. The last time he'd celebrated a victory came a whopping 1,370 days before that, while playing for Manchester City against West Brom (May 7, 2013).
The previous winless run record was joint-held by former Derby players Darren Moore and Kenny Miller, plus current Aston Villa full-back Alan Hutton (29 matches).
7. Dave Bassett's Christmas Party
Come Christmas 1990, Sheffield United were languishing at the foot of the table, but a run of seven consecutive wins in the New Year saw them surge to safety. Similarly, they won just five league games before the festive period the following season, but 11 afterwards.
Inspired by their festive fillips, manager Dave Bassett organised an impromptu early Christmas party ahead of the 1992/93 season opener against Manchester United. Brian Deane netted the Premier League's first-ever goal, the Blades won 2-1 en route to a mid-table finish and they reached the FA Cup semi-finals for good measure. Cheers!
8. Proper play-off pain
Lincoln City were firm promotion contenders in the fourth division back in the mid-noughties, but they were unsuccessful in five consecutive play-offs between 2002 and 2007.
Their misery was compounded in 2010/11, when the Imps were relegated after three stagnant seasons outside the top seven. It’s not all doom and gloom, however – they still need another three defeats to match Brentford and Sheffield United's jointly-held record of eight play-off appearances without ever winning the final.
7. Zlatan's European Cup woe
Zlatan Ibrahimovic is the only player to score for six different clubs in the Champions League (PSG, Ajax, Inter, Barcelona, Milan and Juventus).
And yet, for all those goals, the big Swede has never won the competition. He's done well at being in the wrong place at the wrong time: Barcelona lifted the trophy in 2009 (the season before he joined) with victory over Manchester United, but didn't in Zlatan's solitary season at the Camp Nou. Instead, Inter claimed their first European Cup for 45 years – the club he'd left for Catalonia.
6. Game No.2, beat the Toon
Some will say it’s fate, others coincidence, but up until David Moyes's arrival at Sunderland, the previous four Black Cats bosses had lost their first game in charge and then beaten north-east rivals Newcastle in their second.
Most managers would want to avoid a local derby so soon into their tenure, but Paolo Di Canio, Gus Poyet, Dick Advocaat and Sam Allardyce all benefited from early brownie points. Due to the Magpies' relegation in 2015/16 there was no chance for Moyes to exact the same punishment, though.
5. Harry hates August
Well known, but impossible to ignore: Kane has gone 10 Premier League games in August without scoring for Tottenham. On the opening day of 2017/18 he missed a glorious chance to extend Spurs' advantage over Newcastle, then fired off eight shots against Chelsea without fruition – the most he's ever attempted in a game without scoring.
With most players this wouldn't really be a thing, but Kane has thumped 86 goals in 122 Premier League appearances for Spurs. "It's something that is spoken about a lot, but I'm not too bothered by it," Kane told The Telegraph.
4. Sky Blues singing the blues
Coventry City hold the unwanted record of having not finished in the top six of any division since 1970. The 47-year run has seen them relegated twice, but in that time only finish above 10th four times – in 1977/78 (7th), 1988/89 (7th), 2005/06 (8th) and 2015/16 (8th).
The Sky Blues initially dropped from the Premier League to League One, where financial woes helped them resume this remarkably pathetic run. In 2015/16 they came close to ending it – after the 27th matchday they were fourth, but won only two of their next 14 league games and plummeted to mid-table. Four wins from their last five helped them finish eighth, matching their 2005/06 Championship offering.
3. Arubinha’s frog
In 1937, Brazilian side Andarai were drubbed 12-0 by powerhouses Vasco da Gama. So distraught was Andarai’s goalkeeper Arubinha after the defeat that he prayed for Vasco not to win another championship for 12 years – one for each of the goals he'd conceded.
The story goes that Arubinha then buried a frog under the pitch at Sao Januario, as the creatures were said to have mystical powers. Ten seasons later Vasco hadn’t won another title, so they ordered the entire pitch to be dug up and re-laid in a bid to banish the frog's crushing curse. Incredibly, it worked – the following campaign, Vasco were crowned national champions once more.
2. He'll never make it
Spurs fans will fondly remember Gareth Bale’s time at White Hart Lane. After all, the Welshman netted 56 goals and scooped the PFA Player of the Year award twice in his six campaigns at the club.
But Bale's early days in the first team weren't happy ones, with Spurs failing to post a single win in the first 24 games he played.
Former director of football Damien Comolli claims Harry Redknapp "tried to get rid of" him, a claim Redknapp later denied (of course). One position shunt, an £85m transfer, three Champions League winners' medals and a Copa del Rey crown later, and it's quite ludicrous to think his struggles ever happened in the first place.
1. Guttmann's ghastly pledge
Bela Guttmann delivered five trophies in three seasons as Benfica boss. So, following the 1962 European Cup Final triumph over Real Madrid, he asked for a pay rise.
When the board declined, Guttmann stormed out and famously proclaimed: "Not in a hundred years from now will Benfica ever be European champion."
Since Guttmann 'cursed' the club, the Eagles have duly lost all eight of their European showdowns, including five European Cup finals (1963, 1965, 1968, 1988 and 1990) and three UEFA Cup/Europa League ones (1983, 2013 and 2014) – in 2014/15 on penalties to Sevilla, following late heartbreak against Chelsea in the previous season.
