14. Yossi Benayoun (Liverpool vs Besiktas, 2007/08)
An 8-0 drubbing of Besiktas, featuring a backheeled goal from Ryan Babel, is exactly the type of place you'd expect to find an unlikely hat-trick. This time it was the turn of Benayoun, who mercilessly hammered home three goals against the woeful Turks.
Fun fact: Benayoun is the only player to have scored hat-tricks in the Champions League, Premier League and FA Cup, with his other trebles coming against Burnley and... erm, Havant and Waterlooville respectively.
13. Sylvain Wiltord (Lyon vs Werder Bremen, 2004/05)
In a shocking last-16 tie that finished 10-2 on aggregate to Lyon, it was former Arsenal man Wiltord who dismantled Bremen, scoring four over the course of two legs.
Three of those came in a 7-2 thriller, with future Chelsea men Florent Malouda and Michael Essien also scoring for the Ligue 1 side.
Wiltord, who netted just three goals in Europe for the Gunners, notched six for Lyon in Europe that season, but could only help lesGones reach the quarter-finals.
12. Ivan Klasnic (Werder Bremen vs Anderlecht, 2004/05)
Werder Bremen's mid-2000s squad was brimming with talent: Miroslav Klose, Nelson Valdez, Ailton and Johan Micoud all graced the Weserstadion during this time. Although he wasn't a superstar, Ivan Klasnic was a vital part of the team, scoring 13 goals during their 2003/04 Bundesliga-winning campaign.
He continued his goalscoring spree the following season in Europe, bagging five during the group stage, all of which came against sorry old Anderlecht – including a hat-trick in a 5-1 thrashing. Recent times haven't been as happy for the former Bolton man, who suffers from a debilitating kidney condition and underwent his third transplant in 10 years earlier in 2017.
11. Kostas Mitroglou (Olympiacos vs Anderlecht, 2013/14)
'Kostas Mitroglou we hardly knew ya', is what most Fulham fans would say about the Greek striker’s brief tenure at Craven Cottage. He played only three times for the west London side after signing for a club record fee of around £12m in January 2014.
Said supporters had reason to expect a lot more from the player who'd plundered 62 goals in 149 games for Olympiakos, including this impressive hat-trick (one of four that season) against Anderlecht.
10. Luc Nilis (Anderlecht vs HJK Helsinki, 1993/94)
Nilis didn't last long in the Premier League, so you'd be forgiven for failing to recall his brief spell with Aston Villa in 2000/01, which came to an end when a nasty leg break against Ipswich forced the Belgian to call time on his career.
Happier times were had at Anderlecht, where the striker won four league titles and three domestic cups between 1986 and 1994. The Brussels-based outfit reached the last eight of the Champions League in Nilis' final season at the club, with his treble against HJK helping Les Mauves et Blancs get that far.
9. Walter Pandiani (Deportivo La Coruna vs PSG, 2000/01)
PSG fans must be sick to death of improbable European comebacks. Long before their 6-1 humbling by Barcelona in 2016/17, the French giants raced into a three-goal lead at the Riazor during a second group stage game spearheaded by none other than Jay-Jay Okocha.
Just before the hour mark, Depor decided they'd best do something about the scoreline. Step up future Birmingham City man Walter Pandiani, who rose to the occasion by scoring three close-range headers, with Diego Tristan grabbing the other to complete a remarkable turnaround. The Uruguayan striker's influence helped Deportivo reach the quarter-finals, where they bowed out to a young and boisterous Leeds side.
8. Lucas Perez (Arsenal vs Basel, 2016/17)
Hopes were high for Perez when Arsenal snapped him up in summer 2016, but the Spaniard struggled to nail down a place in the team and ended up re-joining Deportivo La Coruna 12 months later.
The high point of his Gunners career came in a group stage clash with Basel, when Perez beat goalkeeper Tomas Vaclik to fire Arsenal to the top of Group A at PSG's expense. Had he not brought his shooting boots to Switzerland that night, the Ligue 1 giants may have avoided the Barcelona debacle that followed in the round of 16.
7. Uwe Rosler (Kaiserslautern vs HJK Helsinki, 1998/99)
Back in the late '90s, Otto Rehhagel injected a new lease of life into Kaiserslautern as the Red Devils unexpectedly won the Bundesliga title only a year after earning promotion. They weren't quite as successful in the Champions League, but their best result was this 5-2 thrashing of HJK Helsinki in December 1998.
Former Manchester City hero Uwe Rosler was the man who put the Finns to the sword with three bullet headers. Rosler, whose team-mates included a young Michael Ballack, couldn't do much in the next round: they succumbed to their fellow Germans, Bayern Munich, 6-0 on aggregate.
6. Yakubu (Maccabi Haifa vs Olympiakos, 2002/03)
Yakubu is one of modern football's enigmas. He was a skilful but sometimes awkward-looking player, who always scored goals but rarely stayed put for a prolonged period. His journeys have taken him from Nigeria to Israel, Qatar, China, Everton, Reading and Coventry.
Among all that is a Champions League hat-trick for Maccabi Haifa against Olympiakos, scored during the 2002/03 group stage; he also scored a penalty in a 3-0 win over Manchester United in the same campaign. Those performances caught the eye of Harry Redknapp, who signed The Yak for Portsmouth and duly helped the south-coast side earn promotion to the top flight.
5. Roberto Soldado (Valencia vs Genk, 2011/12 and Valencia vs BATE, 2012/13)
Tottenham misfit Soldado struggled to make any sort of positive impression during his two years at White Hart Lane, but it was a different story at previous club Valencia.
The Spanish striker is one of only 18 players to have scored at least two trebles in the competition, with Lionel Messi, Cristiano Ronaldo, Mario Gomez, Luiz Adriano and Filippo Inzaghi the only men with more hat-tricks to their name. His first came in a 7-0 demolition of Genk in 2011/12, before Soldado also struck thrice against BATE the following season.
4. Tuncay Sanli (Fenerbahce vs Manchester United, 2004/05)
Having been blessed with great skill, pace and vision, Tuncay is a cult icon at Middlesbrough and an outright legend for Fenerbahce, where he won three Super Lig titles.
Arguably his finest individual performance for the Yellow Canaries was his hat-trick against Manchester United in 2005, kick-started by a spectacular acrobatic effort. The Turk blew away Alex Ferguson's men, who had already qualified for the knockout stage.
Still, let's not take anything away from Tuncay, who became only the second person to score three against United in said competition. The first, you ask? Original Ronaldo.
3. Nicklas Bendtner (Arsenal vs Porto, 2009/10)
Lord Bendtner struggles to score at the best of times, so the last place you'd expect to see the frustrating Dane crop up is in a list of Champions League hat-tricks. But here he is.
None of his three goals in Arsenal's 5-0 win over Porto were anything special, but we doubt Bendtner cared as he helped the Gunners progress to the quarter-finals. That’s right: Arsenal in the Champions League quarter-finals, where they haven’t been since. Perhaps it’s time to let the Lord have another crack?
2. Bafetimbi Gomis (Lyon vs Dinamo Zagreb, 2011/12)
Swansea fans must have thought they were onto a winner when they landed Gomis, who'd registered just shy of a goal every other game in his final two years at Lyon, in 2014; 13 strikes in 64 Premier League later and the 12-time France international had hot-footed it back to Ligue 1 with Marseille.
Despite his struggles in England, Gomis was a genuinely clinical striker at Lyon – as he demonstrated with a hat-trick in a 7-1 mauling of Dinamo Zagreb in December 2011.
1. Mike Newell (Blackburn vs Rosenborg, 1995/96)
Who was the first Englishman to score a Champions League hat-trick? Alan Shearer? Andy Cole? Michael Owen? No, it was Mike Newell. Of course it was.
The Liverpudlian striker, who was very much behind Shearer and Chris Sutton in the pecking order at Ewood Park, bagged all three goals for Blackburn against Rosenborg in the space of nine minutes – largely due to the Norwegian club's inept defending.
This match was the last game in a group Rovers actually finished bottom of, so the victory and the achievement were somewhat tainted.
Greg Lea is a freelance football journalist who's filled in wherever FourFourTwo needs him since 2014. He became a Crystal Palace fan after watching a 1-0 loss to Port Vale in 1998, and once got on the scoresheet in a primary school game against Wilfried Zaha's Whitehorse Manor (an own goal in an 8-0 defeat).