20. Fin-Alli it's home time
"School went so quick today :)"
Sent by Tottenham and England star Dele Alli back in April 2012, two weeks after his 16th birthday. The midfielder clearly wasn't a fan of double maths.
19. We hope the film wasn't as boring
"Hi. Today we had a game against the junior team. I scored two goals. Now at home watching a movie. bye"
There was no danger of Philippe Coutinho, then at Inter, getting carried away with his brace in 2011.
18. Big day in
"Off 2day so gna download some songs hav a look at a bet for 2nyt stock up on irn bru order dominos for tea! Carlsberg cldnt make that day up"
To be fair to Steven Fletcher, that does sound like a cracking day - Irn-Bru aside.
17. It was abad day
"Not agood day for me i was strangling with a dead leg"
So. Many. Questions. Unfortunately, Victor Wanyama didn't provide any further information.
16. You should have asked
"@DWindass10 ye ime fine thanks"
Nothing particularly unusual about this tweet, until you realise it was sent by Dean Windass in reply to a message that read: "how you doong mate are you ok ?", which was also from Dean Windass.
15. Unlikely fanboy
"Happy Birthday @ollyofficial !"
Nothing to see here, just Real Madrid midfielder Toni Kroos sending his regards to X Factor runner-up Olly Murs. The German's a big fan of Robbie Williams, too.
14. I will always love you
"Whitney has passed away. RIP u will live on forever. Cant believe it. I wanna run to u. Really cant believe this. @"
Wayne Rooney was clearly affected by Whitney Houston's death in 2012. Where do broken hearts go?
13. Opinions with Eric
"Good 2-0 win to finish of the season, aresnal players all the same #wingebags"
Tottenham fans no doubt enjoyed discovering this gem from 2012, when Eric Dier was still at Sporting CP. Never trust an Aresnal player.
12. With a cherry (tomato) on top
"#tryit&tellme Take a tomato and put sugar on it. Taste it if you never tried. It taste like strawberry."
It's August 2013, and Louis Saha is still getting to grips with retirement.
11. Still getting to grips
"What is an RT?"
It's not an endorsement, Mr Jens Lehmann.
10. Is it too late now to say sorry?
"Neymar is the Justin Bieber of football. Brilliant on the old You Tube. Cat p*ss in reality..."
Now unless Joey Barton thinks feline urine is world-class, this hot take from 2013 is officially a Bad Opinion.
9. A picture is worth a thousand words
"Wow. Just got a surprise delivery from #ambrosia custard. Check out my personalised tin !"
You'd be forgiven for reading the above words and assuming Jermain Defoe was excited by his gift. His facial expression in the attached picture suggested otherwise...
8. Yeah, authorities
"Players who roll around when nobody touches them should be subsequently banned. I hate cheats. Authorities should address it."
It's a shame Joey Barton didn't heed his own advice in Burnley's FA Cup tie with Lincoln in February 2017, when the midfielder ran into Matt Rhead's outstretched arm and threw himself to the ground.
7. Eggsplain yourself, Wayne
"@piersmorgan shut up u egg and get out of cowells hole. Won't tell u again."
Wayne Rooney taking both Piers Morgan and Simon Cowell to task in less than 140 characters. And some say he wasn't worth £300,000 a week.
6. Cooking with Vic
"I had spaghetti and it was very nice i enjoyed it"
Simply one of the greatest tweets of all time from Victor Wanyama.
5. Tough love
"I swear if I catch my son dancing behind a reporter on sky like these kids are I'm gonna 2 foot him."
Coming up after the break: Ben Foster Does Parenting.
4. Strictly no dancing
"This Strictly Come Dancing show is a joke. Far too much touchy feely stuff from married men / women. Instant divorce material in my eyes!!!"
Don't expect Michael Owen to appear on the BBC show any time soon.
3. Flick the ste-Rio on
"Hi rio do u want picking up in the morning pal"
Rather than just texting Manchester United team-mate Rio Ferdinand, Wayne Rooney thought he'd send out a tweet to his millions of followers. Sadly, we never found out if the defender took him up on his offer.
2. The oracle
"Can't believe Leicester appointed Ranieri ... Great club, great fanbase but I'm afraid MK rather than Old Trafford season after next."
File under: Tweets That Aged Very Badly. Dietmar Hamann wasn't the only one to predict relegation for eventual champions Leicester in 2015/16, but few did it with such confidence.
1. Rules are there to be broken
"I would Nicebutdim but I'm not allowed to bet on football due to new Premier League rules!"
So explained Joey Barton to Piers Morgan in 2014, three years before he was found guilty of breaking Premier League rules by betting on football.
